The Safety of Madness

ACOUSTIC INK~WRITERS UNPLUGGED

2010-04-15T20:14:00.002-05:00

Acoustic Ink is a site devoted to the works of many talented poets and writers across the world.
Uniting artists to become an unbreakable link of creativity. The ink stain that will remain engraved in your hearts and minds long after you read our words.

Our words will reach out to you and take a hold of you. We want to move you to the core. Take you to places you have never imagined existed, not even in a dream.

Acoustic Ink is the melodic echo you long to hear.

As artists we aim to connect our words throughout the world, bringing us together to expand our horizons, step outside our boundaries and bring the written word to life once more.

Acoustic Ink will feature four talented writers each month, along with various articles, competitions and other goodies for all the writers and readers out there to enjoy.
If you know of a talented Poet that you feel should be featured with us, feel free to drop us a line on our contact page and let us know.

We will be accepting freelance articles very soon! so keep checking our forum for more news.

Thank you for stopping by, enjoy!
Zion.

~I am very honored to be one of the featured poets this month at Acoustic Ink. Come check out all the amazing writers.

BARBIE JO KENNEDY

2010-04-15T20:08:00.008-05:00

This is a band to look out for. Young and rockin. You're going to remember their name!!!

GREATEST HITCH VOL 2

2010-03-13T17:40:00.007-06:00

I have had the pleasure of knowing the talented Eric Howell for over twelve years now. He is a hard working passionate musician. He keeps blowing me away with his dedication. Last year he released his first CD, Greatest Hitch Volume One. I have always related to Eric in the fact that his lyrics remind me so of my own poetry. His lyrics make you fall hard. I was so excited for the release of this CD. His song, "Fast Forwarding," is one of the most beautiful songs I have ever heard in my life. "The curtain falls/You take your bows/I leave my seat. *sigh* I had the pleasure of singing this song with him at the book release party for "The Safety of Madness."

Back to Eric's CD release party. Not only were you getting the CD, but you were also getting a movie of the making of Greatest Hitch. It is incredible. I knew he was going to use a few of my photos for the movie. I didn't know what to expect. Sitting in the front row, watching the movie it came to the scene where my photos were being flashed on the screen. He did such a great job with them. I felt like I was watching "Behind The Music." It looked so fucking cool!!!

Just recently I took some new shots of Eric and his new line up. He loved these new shots and asked for permission to use them in the second movie for his follow up, "Greatest Hitch Vol 2." How could I say no? I can't wait for the next CD and the new movie!!!

Here are some shots from The Cubby Bear show. The lighning was perfection. I never use a flash and when I get lighting like this...you know this girl was ecstatic!

WINTER'S FIERCE BREATH

2010-03-13T17:21:00.003-06:00

I can't believe that it's March already. I feel like my life is on warp speed sometimes. There is so much I want to do. I'm in the middle of finishing up my second poetry book, Winter's Fierce Breath. I'm not on a deadline as I was the first book. I'm taking my time with this one. I have great things going on this year. I think it's a year well deserved, so I am quite happy! Just a few days ago, my wonderful friend Emily mailed me the edited manuscript. My dear friend Christopher Reilley wrote an amazing introduction for the book. Fwah Storm, another one of my closest friends is working on the art for me. This book is going to surpass the first book, at least in my eyes. I am honored to share my words with everyone willing to read. I am even more honored to have my talented friends be a part of this with me. I couldn't do it without them.

The book should hopefully be ready in July. I haven't even begun to think of the release party just yet. I'm pushing the book back a bit. I wanted a June release, but in June I will be heading to Puerto Rico. Woo hoo! Can't wait. It is very exciting for me to get away for some time and spend it with great friends.

I've also been getting more photography gigs lately which is AWESOME for me! As always, I get to combine my love of photography with my love of music. I can't ask for anything better. Looking forward to some studio work for Skye Bleu Studios!! I think this could be a great opportunity for me for future photo gigs! Can't wait!

ZACHARY QUINTO

2010-01-07T12:08:00.003-06:00

If you know who Zachary is, then I don't have to say a word. He is wickedly amazing! Heroes is brilliant and his character Sylar is so good at being bad! I know I'm addicted! Zachary is one to be watched and he will continue to do amazing things! I absolutely adore him!

HAPPY NEW YEAR

2010-01-07T12:03:00.002-06:00

I haven't made any New Year's resolutions. All I know that for 2010 I plan to pursue all my creative endeavors! So many times in life I have felt that I'm meant for something better. I know there has to be more out there for me! I want my voice to be heard.

This year will hopefully bring lots of success and even more happiness. I've been working on my second poetry book, "Winter's Fierce Breath." The book will be released in June. I'm confidant that this book will be even better than the first! After self publishing and learning what mistakes were made in the first, the second will rock!!! I'm very excited. "The Safety of Madness," has reached the world. Friends in Ireland and England have a copy and that makes me so excited! Let's continue to spread poetry all over the world! I want everyone to still be able to relate to what my heart speaks!

WORDS LIVE ON INSPIRATION!!! Let's do this!!

STAR GAZED

2009-12-28T11:19:00.004-06:00

Oblivious to the surface

As it comes to call

Questioning the reasoning

Scribbling the doubt

I'm on fire

In this ice cool parade

Raising the flag

I surrender

Won't you come out to play

Waving the banner

The writing is crystal clear

The method of my mind

Borders genius insanity

Follow the melody

Down the stream you bring

A star filled night of memories

A dream within a dream

I can't stop the feelings

Calling my name

In the middle of the night

I don't know which way to go

Pulling the covers up till it's suffocating

Falling through the leaves

Sweeping me in this time captured reel

My life starring you and me

The fantasy unseen

Altering the core of a star gazed reality

********************

Prathmesh Sawant
Every time you have something of these so very lovely awesome words out in the open, that I get to read. I just stare ..stare with a look of awe and lots and lots of sparkling twinkle in my dreamy eyes. For the sheer reality of words to support the only thoughts, I just have to assume or guess (very often) but somehow I know ..no I am very sure; '... See MoreI know! You lend the voice, to my dreams always. Can I ask for more ..please! 'So as to know what the heart desires and the mind resists.' "This one is sooo very awesome!' Woohoo :)

2009-12-28T10:58:00.004-06:00

Midnight strikes

My sleeping pattern faint

Awake through these endless hours

Regretting my mistakes

I used to fall asleep so sound

Now all I hear are the echos floating around

Surrender flags destroyed in mid air

A solitude without a pair

Hate should be seeping through these veins

The anger coming up second place

It's searching for

The choice of another gate

Blame it on you

Blame it on me

Blame it on a Monday

Since it's the only day

We choose to run away from

Because we hit the beginning too soon

Love

A ghostly shadow

Haunting my innocence

Pushing me over the edge

I held on believing you were that love of my life

Stopping me from soaring over the ledge

My wings have spanned

My departure left before I could place these feet

My arrival has no set time

As the clouds become friends

Hoping they can clear my mind

Though I'm not quite sure they can this time

And I wonder why I've lost my sleep

In the middle of a lonely restless night

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*************************

Vincent Cuccolo
Ah, how I love a fresh poem! ESPECIALLY if it's a poem written by Dina Darling! Great job on this! ^_^"Blame it on a MondaySince it's the only dayWe choose to run away from"... I couldn't agree more on those lines.

************************

Amanda Mahon
Fantastic! Awesome imagery... catchy flow. Eye opener...mind breaker =) great job love!

THE FAREWELL

2009-12-28T10:48:00.005-06:00

I reached out

Every day

Every week

Every hour

Because I cared

Because I wondered

How the sun would have been shining

Underneath your sky

Then the coldness crept in

The silence

The doubt

The fear

Of losing something that held the utmost importance

And you

You let it slip away

How dare you

After all that you said

You made me see the bigger picture

And yet you were the one who kept looking in the wrong direction

I can do nothing because I tried

I'm tired of being defeated

And you lied

Broke all your pretty little promises

And I

I became the foolish girl

Believing in the happily ever after in your tainted world

I give up

I surrender

I'll let go

I'll stay behind

I'll wave farewell

As you sail on by

Thinking about how long it will take me

To stop missing you

Linda Santackas Degnan
Oh, how I can relate to this .... Beautifully put!

Vincent Cuccolo
Oh, Dina! This one REALLY speaks to me! "I'll let goI'll stay behindI'll wave farewell... See MoreAs you sail on byThinking about how long it will take meTo stop missing you"Those lines are amazing! Excellent, Dina! I think I finally have some inspiration now! Which is good because I've been having some writer's block lately! lol.

Taryn Addison
I just finished reading this on my phone - haven't even had coffee yet!! - I simply had to comment. I fricken freakin love this!! Kudos, Beans! It's poignant and beautiful. I can so easily relate right now. I feel like it's mine!

Karen Colon
I can do nothing because I triedI'm tired of being defeatedAnd you liedBroke all your pretty little promisesAnd I... See MoreI became the foolish girlBelieving in the happily ever after in your tainted world Oh yes. That's why I have become so stone hearted. Why waste my time giving love to men? They always end up lying to me to get what they want!

Amanda Mahon
You tell me about getting out of your head... Woman get out of mine! LOL this was FANTASTIC! The rhythym, the wording, the sentiment.. oh goodness... Back with a bang! =D Love it!

NICK IN MY SUN

2009-12-28T10:40:00.004-06:00

Inside I feel the slow ache
Of a life that’s never been
The dusty lane that bled the pages
Of words never said
I can’t turn back an hour
Not even a minute to rewrite a different history
All these changes consume my air
It’s the only thing I breathe

Now that I’m older
The reflection has changed drastically
The innocence lost in the middle of a laugh
The child inside has picked another shadow
I can’t stand the empty pit inside my stomach
The regrets that eat me alive
Were all the hopes I tried to catch
And I waited till they never came

Desolation washes its hands in front of me
Begging me to turn away
The chills running through these bones
Are weary from the way I place my head on the pillow
Come sleep
Come now
Lead me into the sunset
I refuse the pain that sits and waits for me
A red stoplight ready to go green
Light this ache on fire
I’ve sinned enough
I break the day
Another nick in my sun

Copyright: Dina Darling 2009

~~
Vincent Cuccolo
Oh. my. God. I'm speechless, Dina! You DEFINITELY have to add this beauty to your second book of poems! *likes this times a million!*
~~
Karen Colon
Are you reading my fucking mind???!!! Inside I feel the slow ache Of a life that’s never been The dusty lane that bled the pages... Of words never said I can’t turn back an hour Not even a minute to rewrite a different history All these changes consume my air It’s the only thing I breathe That's part of all the mixed emotions I have regarding the death of my dad!
~~
Kelly Burda
I have never read one poem of yours that was less then amazing! You have quite the talent my friend! Keep them coming. :-)
~~
Linda Santackas Degnan
What I like about much of your work is that it mirrors different times in my own life... Your poems are so relateable to all of us....
~~
Amanda Mahon
You know sometimes I wonder if our words could eat us alive.... if they would....I wonder if growing older and learning is really all it's cracked up to be... or if maybe those tiny regrets that seemed so small at the time....grow with age....All I can say is you've captured this wonderfully... and well, I love it. I always love your work!!

IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME...

2009-09-05T11:27:00.003-05:00

I can't believe it's been this long since I've posted to my blog. I used to have access to the website at work, but then I was blocked. There went my down time. I know I have months to catch up on, but I will do a little summary.

Still flying high on the release of my book, "The Safety of Madness." Get your copy also on Amazon.com. I am working on my second poetry book, "Winter's Fierce Breath," to be released some time next year.

Three weeks ago I had surgery. A septoplasty/turbinate reduction. I am still recovering. I hear it will be several weeks before I am one hundred percent again. A very uncomfortable surgery. I hope to be breathing 100% again soon.

At the end of June I had the pleasure of photographing a good friend's wedding in Lake Tahoe! It was beautiful! I also have another wedding shoot the first weekend of October.

New photos to come soon. I know I haven't posted any in so long!

Keeping busy, that's what I've been doing! Hope everyone is doing well and I will try my best not to be gone so long!

MY ROUGH SEAS

2009-06-19T13:19:00.004-05:00

This heart sits heavy

In the middle of a dream

Weeping from what could be

A disillusioned memory

Erased inside a stolen moment

It was never mine

I only captured what I couldn’t have

Don’t you know that’s just not fair?

Of course you didn’t

You were too busy with someone else

Focusing on a fuzzy picture

When I should have been your clarity

Now I see…

These eyelids close

In the middle of a vision

The color shifted to black and white

Once vivid now ordinary in a fake world

It was never mine

Who’s to say I put myself in my own place

When I never even knew where to start this course

That left me without a left or right turn

A barricade that paved the way

For my every action

It was always wrong

Blowing up in my face

And yet at precise moments

It didn’t seem to bother me

At least not today

Time drifts away as it waves goodbye

The sunset teased a happier peace

Its last mistake has ranked first place

Here I go leaving my mark

Why couldn’t you have noticed

It was I with my heart in my hand

Passing along your good taste

Another untouched heart gone to waste

With a pair of passionless lips

You missed your perfect kiss

I’ll never know because you are the water

That could levitate and drown me

All at the same pace

The wave that carries me and sinks me

On a crowded ship of ghosts

I float on this water

Your powerful current

That forces me to sail on to another sea…

***********

MY BOOK IS AVAILABLE!!!

2009-05-01T18:40:00.002-05:00

The wait is over...."The Safety of Madness," is now available!!! If you're interested, please check it out! Thank you everyone for all your support! It means the world!!

THE SAFETY OF MADNESS

2009-04-19T19:21:00.003-05:00

Here is the cover of my book "The Safety of Madness," to be released in June.

ALLY AND BOBBY

2009-04-19T19:17:00.004-05:00

THE ARELLANO FAMILY PORTRAITS

2009-04-19T19:14:00.006-05:00

PHIL ANGOTTI

2009-04-13T15:27:00.006-05:00

My most recent photo with shoot with the incredible Phil Angotti.

ERIC HOWELL, JAMIE MOTZ, RYAN NELSON & MIKE ZELENKO

2009-04-13T15:18:00.006-05:00

Eric Howell, Jamie Motz, Ryan Nelson and Mike Zelenko are all incredible Chicago musicians that play throughout the city. They are all in various bands and are a must see.

MADISON COUNTY

2009-04-13T15:09:00.008-05:00

My family lives in Winterset, Iowa. The town where the book "The Bridges of Madison County," was based upon. I travel to see them about three times a year. Every time I do, I wander around the small town and take photographs.

PHOTOGRAPH FACADE

2009-04-05T20:28:00.004-05:00

Showering in my façade

Icicle droplets

I am soaked to the core of my truth

I shouldn’t have anything to hide, but I do
I am terrified

Beauty is inside out

Is it not, I'm confused...

But not enough see past what should be

And that is a pathetic fashion that saddens me

I protect myself

My mirror covered self

You can not see what is below the chin

I am too ashamed

Embarrassed by what I’ve become

Insecurity ripples on my skin

From my photographs you would never suspect

A plus size girl with a top model effect

I am so good at covering

So fantastic at pretend

Are you deceived by my black and white?

My colored canvas of lens and art

Do you think beauty runs from head to toe?

Not all are blessed with such inclination

I have flaws like everyone else

I’m not afraid to admit them

I hate what I see

I’ll even make fun of myself

Angry that I let myself get like this…

I conjure up a beauty queen

A Cleopatra tease

What if you saw me in person?

Would you head for the nearest door?

Because I wasn’t what you had fantasized in your mind

At least if we’re making love you’d be staring into my eyes

Not necessarily my heavy set thighs

Does a picture tell a thousand words?

What if they were all lies that burned?

Why is it so hard to be who I am?

I may not have the body

But my face can persuade youI

nto thinking otherwise

This face is a keeper

But this body is put to shame

You see a portrait of a girl

Who changes her look to please

After all, a photograph remains

It is sometimes a dream

While the rest of me just fades…

************

WITHOUT A SINGLE REASON

2009-04-05T20:12:00.002-05:00

I hear the answer calling

There is nothing left to say

Without a single reason

I was put away

A tug of war of emotion

I must have held my grip too tight

You let go of the rope without a fight

It confirmed my fears

That I never meant anything to you at all

Caught up in yourself

A self-absorbed sponge

Never going to get dry

You’ve left a mess

And after what you’ve done

No one is going to help you up

Off the pedestal you have built

When you begin to fall

That trip to the bottom is a long way down

And when you land

Pop, there goes your head

And it will be oh so lonely

When no one is left to catch you

I admit I let my emotions get the best of me

I admit this bitch gets my say so

Cause you know I’ve got a lot to say

Everything I’ve done

Was a sacrifice I was willing to make

I put in all that I had

Just to be a good friend

But you used me

Played me for a fool

You cut the line of communication

Without a single reason

You just burned every bridge you’ve ever made

Walking on fire

This stupid masquerade

Who is to blame?

We used to be able to get past any problem

What happened?

Whatever I didI wish I knew

Because I gave everything I had to give to you

This is the lowest thing you could have done

The maturity level lowered till it hit ground

And if this is the end

Best of luck to you

I never thought it would end like this

But the more I rationalize

The more I work it through

I’m utterly hurt and confused

You leave me sad and disappointed in your irrational behavior

If this is the way I’m being treated

Do I really need a person like you in my life?

I’m not one for goodbyes

But if this is indeed goodbye

The ocean has now parted

My words no longer dedicated to you

You lost the one person who cared about you most

And the caring that I placed at your door

Never meant a thing at all

So it now blows away with the wind

As I continue on with my life

That has a brighter future

With or without you

I’m the flame in the fire

That deserves to rise higher

SELF PORTRAIT-REFLECTION

2009-04-05T20:02:00.003-05:00

"Reflection" Christina Aguilera

*****

Look at me

You may think you see

Who I really am

But you'll never know me

Every day

It's as if I play a part

Now I see If I wear a mask

I can fool the world

But I cannot fool my heart

Who is that girl I see

Staring straight back at me?

When will my reflection show

Who I am inside?

I am now

In a world where

I Have to hide my heart

And what I believe in

But somehow I will show the world

What's inside my heart

And be loved for who I am

Who is that girl I see

Staring straight back at me?

Why is my reflection

Someone I don't know?

Must I pretend that

I'm Someone else for all time?

When will my reflection show

Who I am inside?

There's a heart that must be

Free to fly

That burns with a need to know

The reason why

Why must we all conceal

What we think, how we feel?

Must there be a secret me

I'm forced to hide?

I won't pretend that

I'm Someone else for all time

When will my reflection show

Who I am inside?

When will my reflection show

Who I am inside?

SILENT MIDNIGHT

2009-04-05T16:00:00.001-05:00

It is later than it seems
The hands of the clock
Frozen and deformed
A crooked sense of destiny
Leading to an empty doorframe
That I’m trying to keep from falling
Holding on with every piece of my strength
And now I must let go…
I must let it crumble to unrecognizable pieces

The path I have taken
Bumpy and cold
If I could rewind
Would I begin again?
I’m not quite sure
What I would do

If everything happens for a reason
Then where is my explanation for the why and how
I am still searching for my prophecy
Barricaded under the bedroom floor
The rumors slipped and toyed with my outcome
I was misinformed
I put on a show
I pretended no one was watching
I practiced my monologue over and over
Till the words felt like home on my tongue

Now the tongue is a blade
Piercing through anything in which it tastes
Scorned and burned from fate that got lost along the way
I survive
Even if I have to be the one to give up my last breath
There is no other choice to claim today
Right or wrong
Sin or wear my halo
Depends if I want to laugh or cry

I make mistakes just like anybody else
The flashlight seeks me out in the middle of a silent midnight
I am caught
Dressed in stubbornness and jealousy
I have never looked so ugly
Yet if you would have paid better attention
To the hand that was reaching out
It wouldn’t have come to this
I wouldn’t have been so bitter
To be hung out in your treacherous storm
Of icy whips and remarks
My emotions fend for themselves
Without a shield
I take the point of the arrow
Like a good girl should
An end to a new beginning
Life after death
I just don’t know
But I will rest my feet in the tides
And see where the next wave chooses to carry me…

© Dina Darling

PLAY ME

2009-03-28T11:35:00.002-05:00

Capsules in my mind
Separate consuming thoughts
Tug of war with my feelings
Can they exist so freely like this?
You are not mine to play with
What will be the outcome of this unknown game?
I haven’t a clue
But I have a taste

In over my head
Or underneath my bed
Hiding from the fiction
That could slowly peel a visual reality
Is this crazy?
Actually it is
Am I out of context?
I’m always outside of the lines
I don’t know what’s taking over me
But something is steering the wheel…

I am drawn to you
By mystery and curiosity
Whatever web you’re weaving
I am paralyzed by every sticky string
Your charm corrupts me
A twisted magic spell cast on me
A sleep I could only wake up to
If it is you kissing my tender lips

Consume me if you dare
I consume you if I dare
Do we even dare?
We are a creation we put together
A devious script with unrehearsed dialogue
A myth we leave trail behind
Our world’s depths away
Crashing waves
Projecting our SOS
I hear you
Can you hear me?
Who are you?
I don’t even know
But the way your words persuade me
I am a pawn ready to be played

© Dina Darling

MAZE OF TIME

2009-03-21T19:03:00.001-05:00

I wish I had it in me
To cancel out my heart
A repetitive beat
A sound I wish I could be deaf to

Pain exists in figments
I leave open for wounds
I get what’s coming
It’s always what I deserve
Love is a poison
Let’s drink it and be done

You break me piece by piece
Start setting me down
I let the world rest on my shoulders
And this passion is so heavy
My eyelids focus on a dream
Baby, it’s so hard to see
When I see you
And you see past me
The connection will connect
At some point in this maze of time
I have to know it will…

Your beauty is my entertainment
I want to reach out
And delicately trace your face
It’s a face I have always loved
One I’ve been at peace with
When you let me touch
The tenderness in your eyes
Reminds me of how you’re focused on me
When you and I are alone
I want more hours if I could allow
I want more kisses for my lips to give in

It hurts to love you
I’m so far gone
So deep within
I want to erase this heart
Ignore its magnificent beat
I don’t want to lose you
Cause I can’t imagine my life without you
You make me love you
You make me hate you
You bring the fire
You bring the ocean
I bring the love
And I set it out for all to see
At some point in this maze of time
We will finally meet our connection
My love will finally rub off on you
And we shall be complete

© Dina Darling

GUITAR HONOR

2009-03-21T18:54:00.004-05:00

One of the things I love about Facebook is that you come across so many interesting people. There are musicians, artists, writers and just a great diversity of people. I become friends with an artist named Michael Hap Hapner. He goes by HAP. He takes instruments, bikes, hats and whatever he can get his hands on and paints them in his amazing unique way. I think the work he does is incredible. He sent me an e-mail and said that after he does a piece he likes to give it a name. He asked if he could name his newest piece after me. I was honored!!!! So HAP, thank you from the bottom of my heart for naming one of your beautiful pieces after me.

"Every time I paint a reuse guitar, I like to give her a name. This is a late 60's instrument with a lot of talent and class in one package. D.Darling has a nice ring to it." HAP

LET ME

2009-03-21T18:52:00.001-05:00

Crawling through leaves
Each detail unseen
Bruised up knees
Pain and discomfort
Let me bleed

Searching and searching
Dirtying up my hands
They never wash clean
Maybe I like this scene
More than I need
Let me confess

I pull out the whips
I want to be in command
I pull out the chains
I’m going to torture
Anyone who gets in my way
Let me breathe

You say it is what it is
You just don’t know
What it is
Sick of excuses
Burnt out on reason
Boring routine
Let me leave

I hide who I really am
A picture cliché of someone I’m not
All you see are my eyes
Not the rest of me
And if I let you see
Would that be a big surprise?
Does it matter?
Could you find it within you?
Destroy superficiality
And let me be me

© Dina Darling

IS THIS MY PLACE?

2009-03-21T18:48:00.003-05:00

I crave more substance
Than what I already possess
It is my only strength
I am withering
My petals lose their color on the edge
I will not let myself fade
Even if I become caught underneath
Your raging storm

My fuel has leaked across an unfamiliar pavement
Free for pick up if you please
A new destination
But will it really change?
The morose crowd may find me again
And they will attempt to tattoo
Their sadness trademark across my back
I will ask them politely to stay away
But only once!

Have I been penciled in?
Is this a graphic novel?
A wicked comic strip?
I can’t define my own outline
If someone else tries to control me

I need my freedom
My clear sky
My sunny side
A place of peace
Where no more whirlwinds
Can rip me off my feet
I want to stay put
Without feeling as if everything I love
Has been taken away….

© Dina Darling

MISMATCHED

2009-03-16T17:21:00.001-05:00

She’s very peculiar
Talks on and on and on
Did I mention on and on and on
As if she’s afraid she’ll run out of breath
Trying to get her point across
She never makes the finish line
But I just smile and nod my head
As if I’m paying attention
But I’m not, not really
If she came with a remote I’d turn her off
I’d even take the batteries out
Because if I don’t have anything nice to say
I best not say it at all
A pillar of nonsense
Blah, blah, blah
She doesn’t do a thing for me
A weird collage that I don’t get
And I could care less about her
But I’m dying to know
What does she do for him?
I don't see it or how or why?

Oh, she’s all wrong
She’s all wrong for him
A mismatched pattern
A clanging cymbal in a marching parade
She doesn’t share his common interests like I do
Misinterprets his comedy and passion
Just doesn’t get him like I do
Argues for the sake of arguing
I guess that’s okay
If you like that sort of thing
She’s not good enough for him
Not good enough like I am

Maybe she’s not the one to question
I mean, is that what he really likes?
Maybe I should question my own taste
Opposites attract
Some crazy magnetic power
But I think it’s backwards
Just ridiculous to combine oil and honey

Well just as long as he’s happy
That’s all that truly matters
But I know he’s just not happy
Maybe someone should let her know
It breaks me in two
I’m standing on the sidelines while they’re playing the game
I have no energy to cheer
Yet I have the energy to scream at the top of my lungs
I’m lying on the defense
Losing progress
Watching the score drop

No more monkey in the middle
I’m going to let the ball fall hard
When he decides to wake up
Maybe I’ll still be hanging around

© Dina Darling

DREAMS & WHAT IF

2009-03-13T10:12:00.009-05:00

I am fascinated by dreams. I always have been. I believe that when you're more in tune to your dreams you remember them better. I used to keep a dream journal because my dreams were so graphic. Many of my dreams are literally like a movie. So much is happening. I use to dream about vampires constantly! I own several dream books so I immediately had to find out why on earth I was dreaming about vampires so much. This is what it means: The vampire represents personal attributes or negative habits that drain energy and resources or cause emotional exhaustion. Logical explanation....my mother. She is the most negative person I know. Many of my self esteem issues and insecurities are because of her. Am I blaming her? Yes. How many times have I heard "You're too fat. No one makes money as a writer or actress." Everything I wanted to do was stupid to her. I wasn't living in "the real world." My dad used to tell me that my mom was jealous of me. How could a mother be jealous of her daughter? I never understood it. It hurts me. Why can't you just be happy for me? Even with my book coming out, she seems to have no interest. Almost like it is a mockery to her.

I remember the first time I was published. This was the difference between my Mom and Dad. My Mom came home from work and I showed her the book. She grabbed it, glanced at it, threw it on the kitchen table and said that's nice. She didn't pick it back up. When my Dad arrived home I handed him the book. I practically attacked him at the door because I was so excited to be included in this small publication. There he stood in the doorway, keys in hand, jacket still on and read my poem. He was so proud of me. I miss those days! I miss the closeness I used to have with my Dad. My Dad's reaction to my forthcoming book..."cool." It's not the same anymore. My parents divorced when I was twenty one. To me, being older is ten times more harder to deal with a divorce than when you are younger. Why? Because my Dad was active in my life all those years. If I was younger when this happened I would have less memories of him. I have had a very difficult family life. Growing up wasn't always easy. But I will not release any more personal demons in this entry. I am after all writing about dreams. :-)

So let's go back to dreams. When I woke up this morning my dream from last night stuck to me. Mid morning and I still can't shake it. What are those hidden meanings that come across in dreams? Back in 2002 I became very close with someone. I spent as much time with him as possible. He made me happy. We were great friends. We were never intimate with one another, not even a kiss, but our connection was undeniable. The reason we were never intimate was because he was in a relationship. She was away at school, which allowed me to spend time with him. I tried my hardest not to fall for him, but I did. We have many soul mates throughout life. I will claim to this day that he was one of them. We shared common interests, I mean even childhood interests that go back to our favorite book and favorite movie. We had our own inside jokes. Our one simple word that no matter what was going on, we just had to say that word and we knew. We discussed our feelings once. I have to be honest, I don't remember much of the conversation. It was one of those nights where the alcohol decided to speak for me. Was he scared of taking a chance on me? He was with his girlfriend for so long, what if he left her, gave me a chance and then it didn't work out? You know what..."A life lived in fear is a life half lived." You have to take those chances or else you'll never know!! Or maybe I was wrong about the whole thing and it was in fact simply just friendship and I made it into something it was not.

When my Grandma passed away December 19th, 2002 it was the hardest thing I had ever experienced in my life. She was my light, my comfort. Nobody understood me like she did. He came to the wake. I was photographing family portraits for him later that night. He asked if I wanted to cancel. I said no because I didn't want to cry anymore. I needed something to take my mind off what I just lost. I figured he would come back later that night and that was that. He left to pick up his car at a friends house. About an hour later he was back at the funeral home. I said, "Why are you back so soon?" He said, "I felt this is where I needed to be." Wow! That made me love him more. I remember another night when he pulled out his acoustic guitar while hanging out at his place. He sang "Every Rose Has It's Thorn." Well, that it does. It's just those sweet simple memories that latch on to you and you never forget them. So what happened? She came back from school and I saw less and less of him. Eventually they got married. I am about to reveal a confession after all these years. He and I are still friends and I know he visits my blog from time to time. So a personal note to him...you will either be angry with me or sad or feel nothing at all. He had asked me to photograph his wedding reception. I lied and told him I was going out of town to see my family. How in the world could I photograph his WEDDING reception??? I just couldn't!!! I didn't have the strength for that. I couldn't capture your happy moments with someone else because I wasn't a part of those happy moments. It broke my heart. If things would have worked out I know he would have made me happy. We would have been so good together! In my eyes we just fit, you know? I miss him. My heart still cracks a bit when he'll leave me messages with our "special" word. It makes me realize that though he wasn't in love with me(if that is the case), he still cares deeply for me. At least I'd like to believe so.

So why am I spilling the beans about all of this now? Ah, yes...dreams. I dreamt of him last night. We were at show seeing a band that we follow. The band is the reason he and I met. In the dream I hadn't noticed he was there at first. It's been so long since he's been to a show. He was sitting in a chair and turned around. He caught my eye and came over. The first thing he does is hug me. As he pulls back he says "I have something to tell you." He then apologizes to me for not giving our relationship a chance. That it is a regret he lives with. Okay...whoa!!! What?? Why??

The dream upset me a bit. Is that a fact? I honestly don't know. I may never know. Life moves on. It was in the past. Why did I have that dream? Was he giving me my answer that I always asked for, but the only way it could be expressed to me was in a dream? Is it complete bullshit? I can't analyze this too much. I already questioned "What if," a thousand times over. Such is life and it does go on...

EMILY DICKINSON

2009-03-12T11:48:00.006-05:00

Emily Dickinson is a poet I have treasured my whole life. I once received a compliment from someone who admired my poetry. She said this, "I wish you were published. I would own all of your books. I'd worship and memorize them like I do with Emily Dickinson." I was completely floored. That was a compliment I could never imagine myself worthy of. I will cherish her words always.

Another fellow poet once told me this. "This is like your diary put into poetry. Your personal expression is deep and troubled, but from it comes something beautiful." How true her words were. My mind never stops. Words just seem to seep from my pores. I am always thinking. I jot down my words anywhere I can. Post it notes, napkins, my hand sometimes when I've found no paper. I hope I never ever lose inspiration.

I want to share some of Ms. Dickinson's quotes that touch me to the core.

*****

"I'm nobody, who are you?"

*****

"A word is dead when it is said, some say. I say it just begins to live that day. "

*****

"Beauty is not caused. It is."

*****

"Celebrity is the chastisement of merit and the punishment of talent."

*****

"Forever is composed of nows."

*****

"If I feel physically as if the top of my head were taken off

I know that is poetry."

*****

"Saying nothing... sometimes says the most."

*****

"The brain is wider than the sky."

*****

"The soul should always stand ajar, ready to welcome the ecstatic experience."

IF I FLY

2009-03-12T09:43:00.005-05:00

Juggling a million words
I can’t hold them all in my hands
Let alone keep them
From swimming through the channels of my lips
So much I want to say
I refrain
Just in case they pierce you when you least expect
And I can’t handle causing such pain

To myself or anybody else

I attach my wings
My take off is now
Destination anywhere
But where you are
I can’t look you in the eyes the way I remember
You now portray a mysterious stranger
I must make my flight
Better late than never

If I fly

My notes are scribbled
I can’t recognize my own handwriting
The plot is thickening
Aren't you the least bit curious?
I am numb
You haven’t noticed how I’ve changed
But I’ve watched you slowly erase me from your mind
And it kills to know we can never go back to what we once had

My dreams are consumed with images of you
I don’t dream in black and white
I surround myself in vivid coloring
Put back the pieces
They are glued to every inch of me
I need some separation from reality and pretend

Include me
That’s all I ever wanted
Was to be included
Be a memory for you
The days so short
The nights rest endless
Emptiness I never wanted to nest
I just wanted to go home
The rescue of your arms
Where nothing else existed
But you and me…

© Dina Darling

***********

ADAM LAMBERT

2009-03-12T07:55:00.004-05:00

Last year it was David Cook and no one else. This year, well let's just say at first I was pretty bored with American Idol. I kept thinking okay this is great and all, but how many more seasons are they going to do? No one stood out to me and partially that is my fault because I wasn't paying close attention. I'd be online or cleaning up around the house when I had the show on. Then this week, which was Michael Jackson night came along. My friend Michael, who is a huge Idol fan spent the night. We watched the show and he said just wait for Adam Lambert. Since you haven't been paying attention he is going to blow you away. Well here comes Adam singing "Black & White." The vocals on him will amaze you if you haven't been watching. He has a background in Broadway and my God he proved it. He was hitting notes unimaginable. If he is not this years American Idol I refuse to watch it next year.

I had dinner at my Mom's house last night and she even said Adam was going to win. She's in love with him. To quote her, "He's a fox!" She said he reminded her a bit of Elvis Presley and last night when I watched, I have to agree. He is going to be a big star! No doubt about that!

SAY, SAY, SAY

2009-03-11T14:04:00.002-05:00

I constantly complain about my job. I admit it. Many tell me with the economy these days I should be thankful that I do in fact have a job. Of course I am thankful, but that doesn't stop me from having the right to bitch about it. I am allowed. I can and I will.

I hate that sinking feeling of unhappiness. Have you ever had that feeling that you were made for something else? Have you ever questioned what you are doing because you know you are better than what you're doing? I am feeling that right now.

Last July my branch downtown was closed. There was me and another assistant whose job hung in the balance because there was only one position left to be moved. I was chosen. However, me being chosen sent me to an office nowhere near my house. A few years back I had sold my car to pay off some bills. That was heaven. I had so much extra money to play with. It felt great! I was walking distance to the train to and from work. If I needed something, anything at all I could get it. I loved that feeling.

Well because of the location of the office I had to buy a car. The worst thing about selling my car was that it was ALREADY paid off. So here I was starting all over with a brand new car payment and now insurance. My commute is an hour and a half both ways. I am miserable!!! Some days it doesn't bother me, but lately it's really getting to me.

My boss is one of those people that has her little "pets." She talks about EVERYONE behind their back. She shares personal business that she should not be sharing. It's very unprofessional. I work for some gentlemen that our worse than doctors and lawyers. Believe me I know, I worked for both. I am done with this industry. I have no desire to further my career here. I've been with the company six years now and maybe it's just a comfort zone I like to hang out in. But let's be honest, there isn't that much out there to pursue anything else at the moment.

I am trying to be transferred to a previous location I had worked at. I left that original location to go downtown and let me tell you it was the biggest mistake I made. I try not to have any regrets in life, but unfortunately leaving where I was is the biggest regret I have burdening me. Why did I leave my location? For a stupid man, but let's not go into that story right now. I have to stick with believing that "Everything happens for a reason," so eventually I will figure out and understand that very reasoning.

I won't hear anything for a few weeks about the possible move. I have my fingers, toes, eyes and whatever else can be crossed, crossed. I hope it will lift the dark cloud dancing on my head right now.

I am way too creative for the work I am doing on a "9-5" basis. In my heart, I know there is bigger and better things out there waiting for me. I want to focus on my writing and photography. I need to do something with it. I need to get out of this glass cage I feel I am suffocating in. I pray every day that my poetry book will be a success and it can be the road to something better than what I am in. I want a change. I need a change!! I don't want to feel so sick and tired anymore. I want happiness to welcome me with open arms. I will get there....I know I will!

2009-03-11T11:24:00.000-05:00

SELF PORTRAIT WITH SOME FUN COLOR

2009-03-10T20:04:00.002-05:00

I love taking self portaits only for the fact that I can hide my flaws. Being a photographer I know which angle works and which doesn't. After I take them I love to add contrast or what I did here, made a fun eye color and painted my lips. Thought I would share.

PIECE OF WORK

2009-03-09T15:35:00.008-05:00

Here I am
Once again
Biting my lip and then my tongue
Trying with my hardest might
Not to let the spark that is close to ignite
Reach its full flame

I always come back to the drawing board
I erase what is wrong
Then start again
Don’t you know?
I keep rearranging the same thing
A chaotic theory
That’s bland and lame
We must be stuck because we can’t move past
The broken record argument
Skipping and skipping
I’m tired of listening to it

I’m sitting at the table
Tap, tap, tapping my fingers
Drumming my own little tune
Tick tock
My favorite song
Tick tock
There goes the clock
Wasting all of my minutes once more
It’s always me waiting for you
It gets old
Always waiting for you

I flip my day over to make it work
You leave me hanging and I feel like a jerk
I don’t think I’ll ever understand why you do what you do
I think my mind has become programmed
With your subliminal messages
Shouldn’t I feel some remorse?
Any at all?

I lost my patience a long time ago
Think it got stuck down the shower drain
I want more than what you can give
But if you can’t give at all

Then don’t commit to something you cannot
I hate feeling rushed
It only breaks me into tiny pieces
And I feel oh so small
So insignificant
For the hundreth, no, wait…the thousandth time
I’m beginning to lose count
Beginning to lose my cool
As all the hurt just smears together in the end
Leaving me a piece of work I can’t fix

© Dina Darling

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Wenniepoo: Dina, your Poetry is just so unique...I have missed it so much, filled with so much inspiration I just love reading its blessed content, thankyou for sharing your love always, love Wennie xxxhugs

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Crystalclear: Okay, D...you are officially bad as hell in my book. I'm lovin' this, from beginning to end.

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Blakkthought: Incredible piece Dina. I love it. Very well written.

LOVE SICK

2009-03-09T08:02:00.005-05:00

Formations in the clouds
Move too fast for me to comprehend
The darkness versus the light
Who will win the same tired battle?
I won’t place my bets
Because I choose both sides

Never alone but I’m lonely
I want him with me
Playing connect the dots with my freckles
Kissing me under the moonlight
Gazing into my eyes
And using silence to love me
Since we never have to say a word
It’s already written in the stars
Because words can sometimes be so ordinary

I tend to find myself caught up in a volcano of circumstance
My timing is off the charts
Shooting the wrong way
I can never fall into perfect step
I’m either way ahead or lagging miles behind
When is it finally my turn to be in the right place at the right time?

You protect me against yourself
You find logic when I find you absurd
When I pick apart your truth
You tango with my doubt
When I want you one night
You find every reason not to go there

I’ve caused harm to my mind
I can’t stop thinking of you
I’ve caused harm to my heart
I can’t stop the beat from pounding so loud
I’ve caused harm to my lips
They don’t want to kiss anyone else

I’m in love with the idea of love
Of love that sees what you do to me
Of love that knows you should be here with me
But you always hurt the ones you love
And in the process I’m confused
What is love then?
If it doesn’t feature you

© Dina Darling

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Wenniepoo: Wonderful, wonderful writing Dina...I get so amazed at your ability, your talent is to be admired, well done, love Wennie xxxhugs

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E-low: terrific poem...... Love is a an addiction the love addicts dont want a cure for...... even when it is right in front of us.

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Blakthought: Wow!!!!! Incredible

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Crystalclear: Wow, D...You absolutely blew me away with this one! I love the last two lines the best(What is love then? If it doesn’t feature you). Wow, Wow, Wow!!! What a magnificent display of emotions. I'm jealous of your skills, now...lol(just kidding...i support you through thick and thin) Much love and respect,

THING THAT YOU NEED

2009-03-06T08:33:00.008-06:00

Wanting eats up my insides
A virus of deadly resemblance

To the show I wish to project
My curtain call is now
I must perform my best for you

Keep the spotlights shining
I’m not through with this act
Not even close
So much I want to convey
So much I want to do
I tremble at the very thought of you
Coax my mind
The right kind
It can only get better from here

Take a sip
Lick your lips
I’m your best flavor
Come to know
What you’re told
Open those dreamy eyes
Focus on that realization
You should know by now
I’m the girl for you…

You take your chances
You make them last
Holding out for something more
You can take to your liking
I just keep on giving
A battery that never loses its charge

Some might say I should stop
But I’m addicted
An infection without a cure
Static electricity
Zapping my every curve

I will never give up without a fight
You can push me back
I’ll just come at you with my lightning force
You know you’re scared
To change your atmosphere
But darling, my type of scenery
May just be the very thing that you need

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Thevoice: Great write my love. You are so good at writing it makes my heart race! Well done Dina.

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Paul_Rudge: Performance performance encore! Fine build up - the last two lines rock!

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Autodidact: Hot and hard , yet lush without sentimentality. My one beef is dreamy eyes.

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Crystalclear: Kudos, D...do the damn thing. He knows you're what he needs...lol

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Bad-Grammar: Whew, Girl This Felt Like You Were Talking Directly To Me (lol)! Very Hot & Steamy, For Some Reason This Poem Touches Me Like That Song By "The Dream_Rockin That Shit Like" (Which Iz 1 One My Favorite Cutz Out Right Now By Tha Way)! Theres No Need For Me To Say Anything More, You Know I Love Your Style Ma, Great Work

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Blackthought: I love your work. That's all I can say right now. :) I can't wait to see more.

FEELING A BIT EMPTY

2009-03-05T08:34:00.004-06:00

I have been swimming in a sea of emotions lately. Basically I've been floating. I go from happy to sad to just plain frustrated. I think I evaluate too much. I always wished I wasn't born with the sensitive gene. I am too sensitive. I tend to get upset so easily. It's not a characteristic I am proud of.

I have a problem with not being recognized. And I don't mean center of attention,
Look at me, look at me," type of deal. It's not that I was ignored growing up, but there have been many years of negativity surrounding me. I refuse to get into detail. I don't want to put anyone down. Let's just say there has never been much support from certain family members. It's as if when I talk, only the wind is listening. I've become accustomed to that, sadly. As I've grown up to be the woman I am now, I see how my insecurities get to me. I need the acknowledgement that you care. I don't want to hear it, I want it to be shown to me.

I'm disappointed a lot. Let me get up on my soap box for minute. I am always one hundred percent supportive of the people I care about. I am willing to give the shirt off my back if needed. Whatever I can do to make someone happy I will. I go out of my way not because I'm asked, but because I want to. And all that goes into what I'm upset about today...

I'm stressed about the book release. I'm scared that everything isn't going to be ready in time. I'm afraid it's going to look like shit. I'm afraid enough people won't show up to the party. I know I need to just let it happen. "There will be an answer...Let it be." I have friends who say they hope to be there. Even some of my closest friends happened to schedule a few things that conflict with my date. I have to be selfish and honestly say, how often do I publish a book? How hard is it to give me one night? I gave a heads up at the end of February. The party isn't until June. The reason I gave such an advanced notice is so that you don't schedule anything for that day. Is that asking too much? I really didn't think so. But who am I?

ANNOUNCING MY SHOW

2009-03-03T18:29:00.001-06:00

Last night I created the flyer for my release show! Woo hoo!!

FOR KAT

2009-03-03T13:52:00.008-06:00

She is an angel in disguise
Though she’d never admit it
She’d look at you with that little smirk
Brush it off like it was nothing
Then throw a little sarcasm and humor your way

A gypsy of sorts she never stays in one place too long
There’s a great big world

Where she must leave her impression
And if you haven’t had the chance to cross her path
Then you’ll never have the pleasure

Of knowing a presence made of gold

Admirable to the highest degree
Multi talented beyond belief
Her percussion heart is sweet music
Just like a raspberry royale
Her written words are a tug on your soul
The witty insights she can bring to parts of your life
Once the cards are drawn, look out…
Your secrets no longer safe, she just knows!
Her lens can capture a lifetime of expression
A beautiful memory to have and to hold

Kindness to the extreme
Living life to the fullest
The way it should be
A helping hand when in need
An encouragement and inspiration to those she surrounds
Her magnetic personality is a gift

Even to strangers she is a blessing
She draws you in
A light with an unstoppable bright
I wish more of the world could be filled
With amazing people like her

The armor of her strength is exquisite
And if you ever find yourself heart broken
Well she has some pretty good glue to let it be fixed
She finds it works really well
Her courage shall never be defeated
She cannot be knocked down
It’s a fight she will win
The power of conviction
And as she always says
Life is what it is…

© Dina Darling

TANGLED IN RAIN AND WIND

2009-03-03T09:58:00.011-06:00

I made my bed
Guess I better lie down
Quiet now
I’m mesmerizing the sounds of silence
In my mind I can do nothing wrong
My mirrored reflection tells me otherwise

An apology lingers at the edge of my lips
My stubborn accomplice keeps it back
He says, "slow down…you’ve got to wait a minute"
You’re not the only one at fault
So don’t you dare step up first
At least not this time...not this round
You’re always making excuses
Always being the target
The coat of guilt needs to be hung up

On somebody else’s rack

Repetitive arguments clog up the drain
We can never get them to escape
It’s not so easy to flush my fears down the toilet
I’d never let myself give up like that
Some days I believe you’re worth fighting for
And on others I question the very existence of you
The metaphorical reason you’ve been placed back in my view
Won’t someone break apart my why and just explain...

Pretty please?

I’ve struggled, trying to not let my emotions

Show from the inside out
I’ve tried to keep them smothered
Underneath every reason that tries to catch you
I have no alibi to defend how much I want you
I’d curse myself away if I could, but don’t you see…I just can’t…
Between the strength I fall back a step or two
It’s one sided and I keep banging my head

Up against that indestructible wall
I’ve lost the energy to explain myself

So that you’d finally get where I’m coming from
I’ve been your number one supporter

Because I have an endless sky full of belief in you
Yet to you I’m that tornado wind that can rip it all up
The tangled miscommunication lost in our translation

Is only the rain and wind
Sorry is just a five letter word engraved in the dictionary
You have to prove what it means
You have to be kind to me
You have to care instead of rinsing me off

Like the soap on your skin

© Dina Darling

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cmorris: I love the lines,Yet to you I'm that tornado wind that can rip it all up, the tangled miscommunication lost in our translation. Very cool , very good ! ~c

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jjbellinski: Lovely, Dina. There are so many great lines. One I favor is: An apology lingers at the edge of my lips; but there are just so original lines. Very nice indeed.

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A2kdavis: thought that line was great too Dina..."Sorry is just a five letter word engraved in the dictionary"...as well as the many others here..."It's not easy to flush my tears down the toilet" etc. great phrasing and depth of emotion...as you do...Well done!

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Blakkthought: "Sorry is just a five letter word engraved in the dictionary" So true Dina. Incredible piece as always. Great job

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Bad_Grammar: "Sorry is just a five letter word engraved in the dictionaryYou have to prove what it means" I Hate Being Generic And Quoting Your Brilliance Back To You But This Statement Here Shed New Light On A Very Old Topic! I Never Looked At It That Way Dina, You're Still Tha Shit Girl, Great Read

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Crystalclear: love this, D...I really love it. It's like you play jump rope with my heart. My heart skips a thousands beats when it is touched by your words. ...great job as always :-)

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Poeticglow: And you already know I love this piece =)If I could, I'd give you 5000 stars lol!

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Gladious: "Beautiful and great. "

MAKE OUR LOVE REWIND

2009-03-02T14:36:00.007-06:00

Here is another fantastic collaboration with my fellow webooker and friend Vincent.

PoeticGlow:

When the wind comes,
I just can’t help but to
Think about you,
And know no one else…

I guess it’s because
Like the wind, you blow me away…

Dina:

When the stars come out
To blanket my night
I often reminisce about you
You light my way
The perfect gaze

I begin to sway
I know it's because
Each star represents a lit up memory
Of how happy you've made me

PoeticGlow:

But,
You blew me too far, girl,
And my heart got scared,
It grew a thousand doubts,
The truth became impaired…

And when I finally told you,
It was time to part ways,
You just looked at me hard,
Your eyes ablaze…

Now a moment doesn’t come,
Where I don’t think of you…
As these tears fall down,
At how one became two…

Dina:

Part ways...
Was that what you said?
I became deaf to your impaired truth
So now I must share in your sentiment
Do I have a choice?
I break at the very thought of you
With these eyes of fire
The flames reaching towards you
Can I take it back?
Extinguish your doubt
I musn't regret the stars
They once shined so bright

I was your wind you once told me
Where is my strength to blow you away again?
Come back to me
This cannot be
Two will never forgive itself if it becomes one

PoeticGlow:

But even through these tears,
I can still see all that we were…
The memories so clear,
Not the least a blur:

We would embrace forever,
In the warmth of my bed
While the words “I love you”,
Were constantly said…

So can someone please tell me
How something so good went so bad…
She was the one for me,
The other soul I never had…
My God,
If only I had another chance,
If only time could be so kind
To fix this mess,
And make our love rewind.

2009 Vincent Cuccolo and Dina Darling

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Wenniepoo: Wonderful, wonderful work, I got so into this one, love rewind how perfect...I can see a lot of thought went into this creative beauty.

MY WORST NIGHTMARE

2009-02-27T15:22:00.007-06:00

Matt, a friend of mine on Webook asked if I would collaborate on a poem with him. I agreed. Here is the piece we wrote together for his project.

*Blakkthought*

Why are you not calling me back did I do something wrong?

I don't want to assume nothing but it's been too long
I don't know what to think, this never happened before

It's been about ten hrs since you walked out the door

At least call and let me know what's going on in your head

I know we had an argument last night before bed

If that's what this is about we can work that out baby

Just come back home girl, I'm about to start going crazy

Twelve hours passed and I still haven't heard a word

I put in a missing persons this whole event is absurd

Two more hours pass by now I know something is wrong

All of her stuff is in the house I know her choice wasn't to be gone

Then the telephone rings, it's a hospital nurse

Once I heard hospital I expected the worse

She said "Are you Mr. Smith?"

I said "Yes that is me"

I said "What's going on?"

She said "You have a wife named Solita Smith is that she?

I said nothing, I couldn't breathe

I dropped the phone on the floor

Rushed over to the hospital my mind blown once more

I'm speeding through the streets I have to get to my wife

The speed limit is thirty five I'm almost doing that twice

So I get to where she's at and then I ask for her room

A nurse met me at the door, she met me there I assumed

The nurse said "Your wife's lucky she came close to her death"

"She just has a broken leg and a brace up to her chest"

I can't wait to here what happened the cops are gone they can't tell

Why was she so far from home the nurse's thought that as well

The next few days were critical with my wife's life on the line
Me having to tell her family and all of the suspense all combined

I finally got the accident report and it didn't look good

Looks like she ran through a light and she ended up laying on her hood

I don't understand this why would she drive through a light?

She taught me how to drive something doesn't seem right

I'll just go be by her side and pray that she wakes up soon

Everyday she doesn't wake up she's moving closer to her doom

A few months pass by and she finally opens her eyes

I kiss her all over her face what a wonderful surprise

She starts to tell me something but I can hardly hear

She coughed twice in a row to make sure that her throat was clear

*Dina Darling*

So many nights I hesitated

The phone in my hand was dead weight

I couldn’t make that call

You don’t want to know what’s going on in my head

I'm a bit bruised

Tremendously confused

The blame separates and when I’m not blaming you

I blame myself

Ten hours drowning in an ocean of consequence

Each word I wanted to speak muffled underneath

Another cup of coffee

Another argument

A race for the door

I never wanted to look back

I was scared of the unknown

It was superstition to cross that path

Then something told me to get in that car

An instinct I couldn’t ignore

I rolled the windows down

Breathing in the fresh air

Letting it roll around in my hair

Decisions are the worst

They make me crazy

I gripped that steering wheel until my knuckles bled

I pressed the gas

Felt the freedom of speed

Thirty-five gone to seventy

I began to scream

Can you hear me?

I was calling for you

I should have never left

Then up ahead

I saw an angel with black wings

Reaching for me

I was fascinated

I hadn’t noticed the light went from green to red

The impact of the hit was the awakening

The alarm of my life buzzing uncontrollably

The shattering glass was an eerie symphony of realization

There might not be enough time left

As I landed on the hood

I was broken inside and out

Surfacing death

No! No! No!

It can’t end like this

I’m without you

And what if I never get the chance to say goodbye

The bright light fades

Focusing in and out

The closing of a last chapter

I withdraw far away

I hear your voice at my bedside

But is that where I am?

I am coming back to you even if it takes me some time

I made a mistake

I never should have left

I shouldn't have been so angry

To drive off like that

I rebuilt my strength

Because I knew when I opened my eyes

I would be coming back to you baby
And those little arguments that fill up life

Are nothing compared
To living my sweet life with you

MELANCHOLY

2009-02-25T13:38:00.004-06:00

Melancholy plays her haunting tune
A swift change in the weather
The flowers no longer bloom
This day produces sadness
A leaky faucet of memories

He reminded me

Of what could have been
My heart burned
Ached with dull pain
And that is worse, the dullness
I’d rather have the sharp
In and out
Let’s make this quick
So I don’t end up being washed away
By my own bucket of tears

My veil yellowed with age
I never had the chance to let him in
He ran first
Feet of burning flames
He talks down to the regret
Because deep down inside he knows what could have been
He let me slip away
In my heart I know he rewinds
Wishing to reverse the hands of time
A flash of what our life would have made

He reproduces the moments we once shared
To this very day
The crackling of my hurt is heard

This delicate heart just withers away
A bond unspoken we were once familiar
Yet the world was never blind to the closeness we portrayed
Distance was a myth

A false creation

I fight back the waterfall that desperately wants to cleanse these eyes
For I have seen what it would have been like to share my life with him
And the realization that one and one does not equal two
Leaves me with the remains of sadness

That has now down poured on my day

© Dina Darling

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thevoice: You have a beautiful spirit in words great write my friend!

----------------

jjbellinski: This is a magnificent, moving poem with so many beautiful lines that could really feel the sorrow in this piece.

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Blakkthought: Amazing!!!!

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Adam-Jih: Like a sparrows kiss.

BEAUTY

2009-02-24T20:30:00.004-06:00

I found this on photobucket and thought it was incredible! I had to post it!

THE TRIGGER

2009-02-24T14:39:00.014-06:00

The things you tell her
Are fibs in the lies you spin
According to what you tell me
Half and Half doesn’t necessarily make a whole
If you see the perspective from my twisted eyes
You’ll be frightened by what you can believe

I often wonder what you whisper to her at night
That she keeps on believing that her little life is peachy keen
Well I stomp on that sweetness and let the juicy liquid flow
Into the poisonous abyss I keep
Waiting for more than just a noise that lets me stir
In all my possibilities
My will slips through
I break it in half

My weakness is not a toy
Not your remote control
To switch me on and off when you need some entertainment
I play better on my own
Rack em up baby
See which one you can hit
This shot around
So many bouncing back and forth
Now you’re colorblind

I pull my hair out at the thought
Of all the lipstick on your collar
The bouquet of scents lost and confused
Suddenly disturbed and foul
The loaded gun of tricks up your sleeve
Cracked at the barrel
Backfired
Ricocheting off your heart
I’m astounded
Perturbed
Baffled and exhausted
Then I slip on my regret
Choke on the truth
That it wasn’t I who pulled the trigger

© Dina Darling

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*A2Kdavis*

You are gifted Dina and this gutsy and powerful performance is another that proves it...I love all the lines in this...Great!!!!

----------------

*Debra Edwards*

This is very nicely done and I love the Passion of the build-up in-to an angered response. Only after the shot was fired, did you feel regret. Bravo

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*JJbellinski*

Very well-written, Dina. Full of emotion, the way I like them. You've told the story very well.

-----------------

*The Voice*

You are such a gift to read Dina! Great work it's really a good write.

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*Kayzzaman*

You write so beautifully, you sure are a gifted writer...

THE WAY HE GETS ME

2009-02-23T09:02:00.011-06:00

I set myself on fire
By one impure thought
I found him in the middle of my dream
Making me scream till I felt the please
Wrapped in the sheets
The sweat across my chest
I was restless
I needed more to compliment my reality

He drove me to the fiber of my being
I began to shake with just the slip of his name
Coating the edge of my lips
This was bliss don’t you see?
The hunger I feed
He is the only one who can satisfy this craving
That somehow refuses to be tamed

The film projector popped up inside my head
I watched our love scene
Rocking back and forth
Heavy with desire
The bed creaked
And the world shook
Knocked us to the floor
Where nothing else existed
But the moans and the heat
Heaven was above and below
Lips to bite
Hair to pull
Nails to claw
The arched back
His sweet depth inside of me
His tongue rolling around every inch of me

The magnetism of his eyes
Had me locked
A frame freeze
Where I saw the waves of the ocean crash
Rushing every tingle of my delicate private coat
He keeps me warm
Hot and bothered
When he buries his face in the essence of my womanhood
And I fashion a smile that could blind the sun

Day and night
I fantasize when he’s not inside of me
He is the key to unlock all my desires
He's the attraction to get me off
He is the beauty I lay down for the night
He has the power to push every button just right

Copyright Dina Darling

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*A2KDavis*

Haha...I not long ago read this steamy hot piece in another place my friend...Awesome!!!

--------------

*The Voice*

You write of love Dina. It's a beautiful write my friend.

-------------

*Kameron*

WOW! I think I got too into this. Lol. Your one of my favourite writers D.

--------------

*Kayzzaman*

Simply outstanding poem, well done...

--------------

*Curlyman*

Marvelous outpouring of emotion. I like the way the structure vaguely resembles an hour-glass figure, also - is it yours or his, I wonder?If you can get this guy to write an instruction manual, you've got a webook bestseller, methinks! :o)

THE BIG RELEASE

2009-02-23T08:11:00.005-06:00

I've been slacking again on my writing. But, for very good reason! I've been working on my poetry book, "The Safety of Madness." My lovely friend Merry is working on the cover. My friend Taryn is working on the art for the sections of the book. I have a photo shoot coming up with the lovely Kat Fitzgerald for the book. Then once I get the artwork I hand it over to Jeff Dometita (Finneus) for the graphic design and upload of the book. I am nervous and excited at the same time.

We officially set the date for the book release party! It's going to be June 6th at Uncommon Ground (Devon location). I can't wait!! David Kav, Phil Angotti, Eric Howell and Dave Bucher/Steve Tannheimer of Finneus are all going to perform! They are all dear friends of mine that have been in my life for years! I am honored to share this exciting event with them!!

I'll let everyone know when the book is available for purchase on amazon. Woo hoo!!

**Also a bit of a sneak peak...the photo I have attached with this entry is the photo being drawn for the cover of the book**

SNAP OUT OF IT

2009-01-29T14:45:00.006-06:00

Thought I was safe but the net's been ripped to shreds
Felt myself sliding through with nothing left to grasp
Every inch of patience I had given
Blew away when the cold breeze felt like playing games
All the times I tried for you to see it my way
Left the circus in town over staying its welcome for three more days

Wake up
Snap out of it
Why do you keep trying to give your heart away?
Placed on the shelf for observation
The glass cage is close to shattering
Back up
Turn your cheek the other way
Pay your dues
Walk out the door
Believe everything’s going to be okay

I fight
Giving my all until my hands bleed
No use in wiping up this mess if it can never be clean
The hurt you leave in the middle of my dreams
Paints the picture of reality
But the other half it isn’t me
Splash a different color
Throw it away
Just start all over again

This is my final verse
The words have become frozen
Trickling from my lips
The drink you sipped has lost its flavor
And the tears I cry are beating down
Like a hail storm at sunset

Wake up
Snap out of it
Realize he could care less with how you’ve been
Negativity not my style
So I’m going to make it disappear
Turn this damn thing around
Walk out the door and wave goodbye
Everything’s going to be okay now
No matter how much it breaks me in two
Everything’s going to be okay now
Once I accept what it is I have to do

© Dina Darling

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Jay Jay

do i have to tell you again i love the piece dam right i do dina you deserve it cloud in the sky your my wonderful high, dina i dont have to tell you know.

----------------

Blakkthought

Excellent piece. I love it

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Ghost Girl

Everything’s going to be okay nowNo matter how much it breaks me in twoEverything’s going to be okay nowOnce I accept what it is I have to doNow THAT I can pick out as my favourite line! Very inspiring pieces you write.

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Moshell

put me on the book list also.........I cannot read enough of your writing. Your descriptive grasp of inner turmoil never fails to disappoint me...."No use wiping up this mess if I can never be clean", leaves quite an impact, as does the entire piece.Your word choices and arrangement of them are always so powerful, yet never harsh--you are gifted. M.

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Diva69

A fascinating piece , demonstrating pain, strength and a desire to be at peace with oneself . Thank you!

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wenniepoo

Dina...I read your words and I connect to your soul...you are what every body below said and so much more...your greatness is what we all see, love Wennie xxxhugs

WINTER'S FIERCE BREATH

2009-01-29T14:19:00.008-06:00

Winter’s fierce breath is brutal
Her arctic hands upon my skin
Refusing to the let the peace of life in

I wither under the false embrace
My vital scream lost its rhythm
The unfamiliar heart beat
Droned to silence in the mask of fate

Why have I lost such affection?
Bury me with my sympathy
Seal me in good
Then quietly walk away

Your respect has dried up
I’m wasted on your alibi
You try to soothe me with comfortable words
I’ve lost the nerve to believe them anymore
Who have I become?
This ghost like figure wandering aimlessly in sorrow
This desolate feeling creeps up my back
Prickles my skin
And I can’t shake it off

I am wearing the fear goggles
Their fogged up breath
Secluding my vision
I seek truth
But all I surface are lies
My weakness nauseates me
I wish to build the strength
To climb over this segment of doubt

You are winter’s fierce companion
Blowing this wicked breeze up my skirt
Your arctic hands choke my skin
You signal to strangers for any ounce of attention to popularize a name
I have a problem with that
You should light the fire in those closest to you
Those who would walk across the mountains
And spark the sun to shed its powerful warmth on you
But you blew out the candle
And I am through
Getting use to this darkness
And finding my way out

Copyright Dina Darling

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The Webook reviews:

Wenniepoo:

Wow!!! Dina you are so powerfully charged up...sometimes we can take it...seems like forever and then from no-where we are fed up with the whole show...this one reminds me of that, absolutely fabulous lines...when you're on a roll there is nothing stopping you...your brilliance just shines like the sun so creatively...

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Santackas:

You are a light within yourself, Dina, you don't need some one else's remnants to shine on you...you glow on your own!!!

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Lantern:

If someone has the audacity, however that word is spelled. lolIf someone can treat someone that emotionless, that cold;then that person should be kicked to the curb. Love is a beautiful thing and it sucks when people deal with so much bullshit to acquire it, but no matter how much shit they take, they don't get what they yearn for. Sometimes you just got to cut your losses and find someone is isn't an ogre.

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A2kdavis:

Awesome Dina...That intro is brilliant...Winter's fierce breath is brutal, Her arctic hands upon my skin...Love it!This poem has tons of great phrasing...I could go on and on lol...Always a great read!

DANGEROUS REGRET

2009-01-23T13:21:00.010-06:00

I love the diversity of webook. There are so many projects you are invited to be a part of. There is one in particular that I love. The project was opened by the goddess of poetry herself, Zion. It is called Theater of the Absurd. (A theatrical show of the mind, when nothing makes sense except inside your head) What I love about it, is that you can write whatever comes to mind. You can be chaotic, you can be dark. This project challenges me because I can be dark and witty or write whatever I want, completely out of my norm. It's fun to be really dark when I want to be. Here is my latest entry to Theater of the Absurd.

DANGEROUS REGRET

Lick away the ashes
The roasted marshmallow burnt on my tongue
The fib I unfolded is now kicked to the curb
I am mute
Forbidden to speak the truth
It leaked
Burning from in between my thighs
The place your lips once tasted paradise
You chain my hands
I bite to break free
You could never rule me
And I electrify knowing that it kills you

I paint a dirty story book picture
In broken crayola’s
Every color that touches the page eerily fades
A shade erased in the outline that spoiled your lies
A press of the button and you’re gone
A mist above the sunken sea
Rising above to drown in the stale air
I always knew you could be so suffocating
Yet there is a thrill in the choking
A rise of heat upon my flesh
That in the middle of chaos it still excites me
And the tricks my mind plays
A delicious movie scene
A silence of wet dreams
Invading the space where my mind
Rolled out the red carpet for you

The act begins
Stage left
I crawl on my knees to the center mark
Lying on the floor
Moaning and touching the right spot
Never so good to me
I don’t need you when I’m the one with the magic hand
Suck on a lollipop you candy man
Keep aiming because your target is way off
My diamond trail of dust washes your face
Before you hit the sheets at night
Do you now soak in the regret
That you never truly had me?

Copyright Dina Darling

Reviews

Miss Amanda

OMG I LOVE IT! You MUST READ THIS ALOUD.. (next time)Rising above to drown in the stale airI always knew you could be so suffocatingYet there is a thrill in the choking(How you did it, I don't know - but I do know that it's hot, intense, and sooo evocative!)I don’t need you when I’m the one with the magic handSuck on a lollipop you candy man(One word - AWESOME!!!! ha.. this is so creative love it!)5 stars!! And a huge smile on my face! Ah to be a woman!! =D

Blakkthought

I would give this piece 10 stars if I could. There are so many lines that are just incredible LOL "Do you soak in the regret That you never trully had me? LOL what an ending. Very very good

Lantern:

"I paint a dirty story book pictureIn broken crayola’sEvery color that touches the page eerily fades"This is my favourite part by far.Probably because I have a thing for crayons. lolIs it odd that I pictured sex while camping when I read this?If I were to guess that's what it would be.Nonetheless you had some fierce lines and strong words, that you could make this poem about anything.Versatility is a sexy thing.

Paul Rudge

Or the playful side becomes wicked?Good write - love the way you play with words in this theatre D

A2Kdavis

Daring and sensually devine...What a brilliant write...again!I thoroughly enjoyed this especially the last stanza...Great ending...in ya' face! Good stuff Dina!

Zion

haha omg i love this from the very beginningLick away the ashesThe roasted marshmallow burnt on my tonguethen...I am muteForbidden to speak the truthIt leakedBurning from in between my thighsThe place your lips once tasted paradiseGasp!!!!!! lol i love it!

MAYBE NEXT TIME

2009-01-23T11:52:00.002-06:00

Well I wimped out. I didn't end up doing my first open mic nite after all. It was a mixture of a few things. First, I was meeting a few friends for dinner beforehand. Traffic was horrible. It took me over an hour and half to get there when it should have only taken me no more than forty minutes. Frustration number one. Traffic just so happens to be one of the first things that can make me crabby in life. Plus, I'd love to find one street, just one that doesn't have a giant pothole in it! Argh!

I was looking for a parking spot and spotted one on the opposite side of the street. I had turned the car around when I saw this guy walking on the side of the street. No clue as to why he wasn't using the sidewalk. It wasn't covered in snow. I guess he didn't like the fact that I turned around. The next thing I know this guy is SCREAMING at me. Not only is he screaming at the top of his lungs, but he is waving his arms all over the place and pointing at me. Without trying to run him over, which at this point you know I wanted to...he comes up to my side window and as he is still screaming calls me a C U next Tuesday word if you know what I mean. What an awful word! I think it is one of the worst words anyone can call a female. As I was about to pull away from the maniac he POUNDS his fist on my back window. The impact was so loud, I honestly thought my window was going to shatter. I got away from him and pulled into my parking spot. I waited to get out of the car making sure he was no longer in sight. Kelly and I were both freaked out. I was shaking so bad once I got into Uncommon Ground. It took a good hour before I calmed down.

When I was asked if I was ready for open mic I said no. I saw the disappointed look, but I said hear me out. I'm not ready. I then explained my reasoning as to why I wasn't ready (believe I mentioned my reasons in a previous post) and that I would do it another time. And I will. I won't back down from doing it. I just need to feel more comfortable and more prepared.

I truly enjoyed the atmosphere of Uncommon Ground. Once everything calmed down, I had a blast! I met some great new musicians that I look forward to seeing again. I have to say one thing though. It takes courage to get up in front of an audience and do your thing. I don't care what it is your doing, but I give so much credit to those that do. There was a table just next to us with a guy and two girls. Now we were right on the side of the stage, this table right in front of the stage. For a few of the performers these people did nothing but make faces and laugh. How rude!!! During another performance a table in the back practically talked above the musician playing. If you're coming to an open mic night have the decency to listen to the musicians! I bit my tongue. I wanted to walk up to that table and say "Are you performing tonight?" I don't see you getting up there!! I've said it before and I'll say it again...this proves my point as to why two of the things I despise in this world are ignorance and arrogance!!

BOOST OF CONFIDENCE

2009-01-20T14:42:00.004-06:00

There are days where we sometimes feel that what we're doing isn't making an impact on others around us. Some days I get pretty down, wondering if I ever waste my time on certain things. Going back to this open mic thing, I received another e-mail from my friend Paul Rudge. He had this to say...

you have a great style of writing, there is depth, humour, passion, flamboyance, attitude, vulnerability (to name a few) which leap from the screen into my heart and brain when I read your postings.

He did get into further detail about the whole live performance aspect, but I will not post that. What I thought about doing when I need that little boost is to post some of the beautiful feedback I received from other writers I share my work with. Webook has created such a great community of positivity that you do feel like you are making a difference if not to a bunch to at least one.

For my poem "Swallow Survival."

From Bad Grammar:
A strong woman is a sexy woman... And this is a very strong piece from a sexy survivalist!

From Miss Amanda:
Anyone who reads this poem could certainly learn a great deal from it. You are such a smart woman and it's motivating to see how you've laid out the empowerment strategies for others in such a tormenting and distracting situation! 5 stars, easily.

From John:
Dear Dina I think this is the best poem you have written it is absolutely brilliant from beginning to end. I must admit I am not a great fan of your subject but what can I say. Your brilliance overcame that.

A GREAT PIECE OF ADVICE

2009-01-20T11:51:00.003-06:00

On Sunday I had brunch at a lovely place called "The Magnolia Cafe," with an incredible woman Kat Fitzgerald. I admire her greatly. She is a gypsy, as she likes to call herself and she is worldly, expressive and talented. I love her view on life. There are no excuses, ever! Her positive energy simply amazes me. I told her about my upcoming poetry book. Kat hosts the open mic night at "Uncommon Ground." A great venue for local musicians to showcase their work. She invited me to read some of my poems at the show tonight. I told her no way. It's one thing to write the poems, but to actually read them aloud to an audience is completely nerve racking to me. She said get up there and do it! I have to admit, I did some research this morning on reciting poetry. I am not prepared at all. I'm still going to the show tonight, but now I am having second thoughts about getting up there. I'm not trying to back out of it. I promise! I will do it. I need to memorize the poems I choose to read. That will be the most effective reading from what I have read. I just don't want to get up there and read from a piece of paper. I want the audience to feel my written words. I'm just not ready. I am still going to check out the atmosphere, but whether I decide to get up there or not will be determined once I'm actually there and I get a vibe of the place.

I sent a message out to my fellow webookers and asked them for suggestions on which poems I should read. Their response was amazing. I wish they could all be in the audience with me. It was even more amazing that they all chose different poems. There were maybe two of them who agreed on the same poem. It makes my decision even harder.

Dom Unique, a fellow webooker is no stranger to reciting the written word. He didn't pick a poem. He told me to read what was in my heart. He said this to me and I told him I'm printing it and carrying it with me tonight.

"I'll admit, the first time is very scary. But at the end of the day, you have to know who you are, regardless who likes it or not. What keeps me going is this: if I can inspire one person, uplift one person, bring a smile to one person's face...then I accomplished what I set out to do. and from there, it gets easier and easier. As writers we have the power to change someones life. Now it's your turn to be the voice of the pen, which in turn, is the voice of your heart."
Dom

Now that is priceless!!

MY ART MOVEMENT

2009-01-16T14:42:00.001-06:00

You Are Romanticism

You are likely to see the world as it should be, not as it is.

You prefer to celebrate the great things people do... not the horrors they're capable of.

For you, there is nothing more inspiring than a great hero.

You believe that great art reflects the artist's imagination and true ideals.

What Art Movement Are You?

FAMOUS PINUP

2009-01-16T14:37:00.001-06:00

Still bored out of my mind...twenty minutes and counting till I get to go home!

You Are Brigitte Bardot

Naturally sensual and beautiful

You're an exotic beauty who turns heads everywhere

You've got a look that's one of a kind

What Famous Pinup Are You?

CLASSIC BEAUTY

2009-01-16T14:34:00.000-06:00

You Are a Classic Beauty!

You have a timeless beauty that looks great in every decade

Instead following trends, you stick to what works

And this means you never skimp on your beauty routine

Upside? Your classic looks tends to attract gentlemen - not boys.

What Type of Beauty Are You?

MY CREATIVE LEVEL

2009-01-16T14:31:00.001-06:00

You Are 78% Creative

You are beyond creative. You are a true artist - even if it's not in the conventional sense of the word.

You love creating for its own sake, and you find yourself quite inspired at times.

How Creative Are You?

I'M MERLOT

2009-01-16T13:59:00.001-06:00

You Are Merlot

Smooth, confident, and popular - you're the type most likely to order wine for the whole group.

You seem to breeze through life on your intuition and wit. And no one seems to mind!

You're comfortable in any social situation you find yourself in, and you never feel outclassed.

And while you live a charmed life, you never let it go to your head. You are truly down to earth and a great friend.

Deep down you are: Balanced and mature

Your partying style: Surprisingly wild... when you let loose, you really let loose

Your company is enjoyed best with: Some greasy pizza

What Kind of Wine Are You?

WHAT SIGN DO I ATTRACT?

2009-01-16T13:39:00.003-06:00

I'm bored okay!! Check out blogthings for all kinds of fun quizzes...

You Attract a Pisces

When dreamy, romantic, imaginative Pisces meets you, they've met their match.
You are able to inspire Pisces with your dreams and ideas.

You don't take it personally when your Pisces needs time to think and wonder.
You just stay loving, understanding, and honest. That's how you make sure your Pisces is dreaming of you.

What'>http://www.blogthings.com/whatsigndoyouattractquiz/">What Sign Do You Attract?

WHAT'S MY WORD?

2009-01-16T13:35:00.000-06:00

Your Word is "Fearless"

You see life as your one chance to experience everything, and you just go for it!
You believe the biggest risk is being afraid and missing out on something amazing.

Sometimes your fearlessness means you're daring. You enjoy risky activities.
And sometimes your fearlessness means you're courageous. You're brave enough to do the right thing, even when it's scary.

What's" Your Word?

ANNOYANCE

2009-01-16T12:47:00.005-06:00

I'm addicted to Wikipedia by the way...Here's what they have to say about good ole annoyance!

Annoyance is an unpleasant mental state that is characterized by such effects as irritation and distraction from one's conscious thinking. It can lead to emotions such as frustration and anger. The property of being easily annoyed is called petulance. "Annoy" (like the French ennui, a word traced by etymologists to a Latin phrase, in odio esse, to be "in hatred" or hateful of someone), to vex or affect with irritation or large proportions. In the sense of "nuisance," the noun "annoyance" is found in the English "Jury of Annoyance" appointed by an act of 1754 to report upon obstructions in the highways. (Which, wouldn't we all agree that the world is simply one giant pothole? Are they ever going to fix the streets already!?)

A little too much information, but I'm going to say it anyway...I'm a week away from PMS and I feel like today is the volcano eruption of irritability, annoyance, crabbiness...you name it, I've got it all right now!! Today started off as good as any other day. Maybe the cold temperatures have messed with every one's head and we're all just a little nuts right now. We didn't know we've become a part of Antarctica. A friend of mine has been posting how the North Pole is warmer than our weather! Go figure! Speaking of freezing, I'm numb typing this. Our office had a power outage last night and since then we've had no printers, our computers have been slow and lights have blown out throughout the office. Weird if you ask me. I don't feel like working anymore. I'm calling myself done for the day, though I have two hours left.

My buttons are certainly being pushed today. I have had one person be completely sarcastic and you know what, after awhile sarcasm gets really old so bite it. I've had an ex that's unavoidable unfortunately try and be cute with me. Your once charming personality is now deadly venom. Stay away from me! Then a co-worker, who of course shall remain nameless is on one of his many rampages where nothing is good enough, everything is questioned, paranoid about every minor detail and well you've officially become the pin to pop my balloon. Chill the fuck out!!! Take a pill and calm down you freaking spazz! Then I've come across postings that just shouldn't be posted. Why are you even leaving comments? When did your head fill up with nothing but air?? You make no sense and you know what....don't really care at this point! Get a clue!

I know I'm being harsh. I can't help it! There's only so much you can take some days. We've all been there I'm sure. I'm entitled to be a bitch every now and again. Don't even go there? I just went there!!

To quote Britney Spears..."You say I'm crazy? I got your crazy!"

ONE STEP CLOSER

2009-01-14T20:03:00.003-06:00

Last night David Kav and I worked on my poetry book. He had the first draft ready! I can't believe this is happening!! I've always wanted to do this book, but I have to be honest I never gave it much thought. I never thought I'd actually do it. Having him be a part of this just blows me away. He is an incredible musician and I am honored that he is taking the time to help with my art. I can't even begin to explain the feeling you get when someone cares and believes in you that much! Plus, he is a great deal of the inspiration behind many of the poems! Our history speaks volumes in my words. We lost touch for many years, but maybe that's why we were brought back into each others lives. I worked on his CD and he is working on my book! A creative connection that was a must? I think so! I am so happy right now! Everything happens for a reason right? It sure does! Always good times with him!

We've changed up a few things and we are both very happy with the direction this is going in. I was hoping for the beginning of March, but it may be the end of March now...possibly pushing into June. I've said it before and I'll say it again. I don't want to rush this at all. Will it be true that "Good things come to those who wait?" I will have to wait and see. I want to spill out everything about the book, but I want it to be a mystery too. I'm not going to say too much because I want everyone to be impressed with the finished product!! Us artists (in all forms) have to stick together. This is just so rockin!! Woo hoo!!! Yeah, that's all I've got right now!

WHAT'S IN A NAME...

2009-01-14T19:55:00.004-06:00

I was reading my friend Sandy's blog...let me give my shout out to her....check out her blog Sandy's Island. She is one amazing woman!! One of her blog entries talked about what is the meaning of your name and does it suit you. I thought, hmm...I wonder let's do a search. This is what came up for mine...

The meaning of Dina
Dina has multiple meanings and origins. The English version of Dina means From the valley. The Spanish version of Dina means Form of Hebrew Dinah. Judged and vindicated. In the bible Dinah was Jacob's only daughter.. The Hebrew version of Dina means Avenged Judged and vindicated. In the bible Dinah was Jacob's only daughter..

Numerological Meaning
People with this name tend to be natural leaders, self-sufficient, and ambitious. They generally want to make their own decisions in life and are not afraid to take charge or manage a situation. It is important for them to avoid extremes of bossiness or shyness. They tend to be too impulsive. Professionally, they can be successful in political leadership, celebrity status, or as a small business owner.

I've always been interested in things like this!

SWALLOW SURVIVE

2009-01-13T12:58:00.001-06:00

I’m sinking in a bad place right now
In the zone
Leave me alone
I can’t get out of this darkness
This darkness that surrounds my fragile thoughts
Climbing over the walls with aggravation
Ripping into my pores
This isn’t the way I like to portray who I am
I’m almost ashamed of myself
Though why should I be?
The glitter in the air is now dust
Pushing my way through all the pain you laid

I’m exhausted
Broken in two
The dim light disappearing into the blue
Drowning faster in your ocean
You consume the depths of my mind
Like a waterfall
I need to release this rushing sensation
I’m numb
The feeling is gone
Choking on my tears
How do you really learn to say goodbye
When it crosses your lips and you swallow it back down

You push me around
Whether it’s subconsciously
Or for your own personal amusement
Then you walk away and I’m left punching holes in my shadow
A toy in your game
Beating me to the floor
I said leave me alone
Keep walking across
The stains permanently engravedWatch them bleed
Every time you think it might be good to speak my name

In the zone
Bounded by this invisible box
I can’t go up
I always face down
Circle round and round
Choking on my tears
How do you really learn to say goodbye
When it crosses your lips and you swallow it back down
You learn how…
You learn how to survive

© Dina Darling

TRYING SO HARD

2009-01-13T12:57:00.002-06:00

I don’t want to do this anymore
Risk my heart like it never meant anything
Say you will, say you won’t
But you don’t get me
This open book has been slammed shut
Now you must fess up and face it
Just face it
As your shining beauty begins to fade

Threw me out into the cold
The piercing blizzard knocked me to my knees
I was about to reach up towards the sky
My arms come back down
I refuse to pray
Cause somehow I no longer believe
No one’s listening to these silent cries
Maybe now is that time to scream aloud
I don’t want to walk away like this
But sometimes they say
Silence speaks louder than any words
Or was that action….oh well, my words
They’d just do you harm anyway…

How do you break free from sadness
When it knows you by name
Never thought I’d get so personal with you
How do you break a link in the chain
That keeps you getting up each day
A one sided feeling gets a little lonely
Looking outside in
Peeking into something that doesn't exisit
Somewhere I don’t belong
I'll never be a piece of your complicated puzzle
An equation I could never figure out
You couldn’t care less all along
I pushed too hard
Fell flat on my face
Guess that’s what I get for trying so hard

WINTER BLUES

2009-01-13T12:13:00.002-06:00

I believe this may very well be my first "vent" blog of the year!! I am so tired of this awful snow!!! Don't get me wrong, I love the snow! I think it's absolutely beautiful! It's just that we've had ENOUGH already!!! I can't take anymore!! It has not snowed this much in so many years! It wouldn't bother me so much if I were still working downtown, but driving to Northbrook in it is killer!! The very first snowfall we saw in December took me four hours to get home!!! Another day three hours just to get to work! I've already had to call off two days because I wasn't about to drive in the snow and icy conditions. I'm wasting perfectly good vacation and sick days and it's only January 13th!

Plus the weather is definitely giving me the blues. I'm just so blah lately! It's so hard to break free of that funk sometimes. I've written lots of poetry lately. I'll have to come back and post some. I'm also in that stage where I find myself pondering those life questions. Is this it for me? What else is out there? Because believe me...I know there is more! I sometimes rush things. I get so impatient and I know I have to realize things take time. I have to wait and see.

I'm so anxious for my poetry book. I'm working on more tonight. I hope this book is a success and people appreciate what I have to say.

I want so much more! I get so frustrated with work and wish I made enough money to simply focus on my creative endeavors. That's all I can think about! I want a change!!

Argh!! At least the sun is shining today!! That always makes me happy!

IF I WERE A POET (But I am)

2009-01-08T10:45:00.001-06:00

I took the "If You Were a Poet..." quiz on gURL.com
		I am... Elizabeth Barrett Browning Does love inspire you to express yourself with an ardor you didn't know you had? Nineteenth century British poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning would understand. Read more... Which poet are you?

I AM A LEO

2009-01-08T10:36:00.002-06:00

Leo is the fifth Sign of the Zodiac. These folks are impossible to miss, since they love being center stage. Making an impression is Job One for Leos, and when you consider their personal magnetism, you see the job is quite easy. Leos are an ambitious lot, and their strength of purpose allows them to accomplish a great deal. The fact that these folks are also creative makes their endeavors fun for them and everyone else. It's quite common to see a Leo on stage or in Hollywood, since these folks never shy away from the limelight. They are also supremely talented and have a flair for the dramatic. Warmth and enthusiasm seems to seep from every Leo pore, making these folks a pleasure to be around. They do love pleasure!
It's the Lion which symbolizes Leos, and the king (or queen) of the jungle is a most appropriate mascot, since these folks consider themselves the rulers of their universe (and the Zodiac at that). Like Lions, Leos tend to be dignified and strong, and it is this sense of their power, which allows them to get things done. A Leo on your team is a good thing, since Lions are eager to see their projects through to completion. Putting these folks at the helm is a good thing, too, since the Leo-born are natural leaders. They may ruffle a few feathers along the way, however, since they can also be overbearing and somewhat autocratic. This may be in keeping with the Fixed Quality assigned to this Sign--Lions are indeed opinionated and set in their ways. That said, they are well organized, idealistic and have a knack for inspiring others.

Leo is ruled by the Sun, the center of the universe and the fuel for our being. In much the same way, Leos consider themselves indispensable and the center of the universe, and those who would tell them otherwise had better look out! Lions are outgoing, self-assured and have a tremendous zest for life. So what if the world revolves around them? There are worse role models, for sure. The Lion's enthusiasm is boundless, and along with that comes generosity of spirit and the determination to succeed. That focus may be construed as vanity and even bossiness at times, but Lions would say 'No way!' and continue along their regal path. Regardless of appearance, those born under this Sign can be counted on for their loyalty and sense of honor. They are also decisive, intensely proud and wonderfully romantic.
The Element associated with Leo is Fire. Everything about the Lion's personality is hot, hot, hot. Those born under this Sign are fearless and strong, which may be why Lions plunge in head first and let the chips fall where they may. Thankfully, Leos are dignified enough not to commit too many pratfalls. It's the Lion's unswerving courage that wins so many folks over. If you need someone to lead the charge, call a Leo--and the bigger the project, the better, since these folks love an expansive stage (and the audience that comes with it). While some would take to calling Lions status-conscious, these folks are truly warmhearted and want everyone to be happy. Hey, it's their kingdom, and happy campers make for a perfect peace. Further, it's the great gift of the Leo-born to be dynamic, forward-thinking and self-confident. These attributes certainly catch the attention of others, making Leos sought after by both friends and lovers. The Lion's charms extend to all. Yes, the pleasure principle is paramount to the Lion, and along those lines, Leos are great at spending money. Lions can't fathom an uncomfortable throne.

Come play time, Leos are at their best. Those born under this Sign enjoy fun and games both outdoors and in (and with a group), so expect to find them playing softball, hockey or a game of cards. Lions are also a natural at the gym, where they can show their stuff to a crowd. When the lights are low, the essential Lion comes to the fore, since this beast is 90% fun and 100% romantic. The Leo lover is devoted, creative and almost too hot to handle! Since Leo rules the heart and back, however, overzealous Lions may have to take a deep breath and slow down a bit. You can bet that the Lion's home will be swaddled in royal purple and gold.
The great strengths of the Leo-born are their creativity, idealism and leadership. Lions don't lack for ambition, either, so they're likely to accomplish a lot--and have fun while they're at it. Their warmth and loyalty ensures that others will enjoy the ride as well.

A REALIST

2009-01-08T10:32:00.000-06:00

I took the ""if you were an artist" quiz on gURL.com
		I would be a... Realist Are you down-to-earth? Straightforward? No nonsense? If so, it seems like you could be a realist artist. Realism was an art movement that evolved during the mid-1800s, in which the artists depicted their subjects as accurately as possible. Read more... what kind of artist would you be?

PROMOTING MYSELF

2009-01-08T09:44:00.004-06:00

I used to have a website for my photography, but for a while I put the camera aside and focused on some other things. Boy, was I stupid for that. Never put your art aside. You have to keep doing what you love. The website ended up getting too expensive so I joined myspace and facebook to promote my work.

If anyone is on either one...add me as a friend and become a fan of my photography page.

Dina Darling on My Space

Dina Darling on Facebook

Six Random Things...

2009-01-06T11:56:00.006-06:00

A Square Peg tagged me for a meme--6 random things about me.

Here are the rules:
1. Link to the person who tagged you.
2. Post the rules on your blog.
3. Write six random things about yourself.
4. Tag six people at the end of your post and link to them.
5. Let each person know they’ve been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
6. Let the tagger know when your entry is up.

Welcome to my randomness:

1.) I was born blind. I had four eye surgeries as a child to only have the vision come back in the right eye not the left. People always ask me how I manage to function since I am a tad bit on the clumsy side. They wonder how do I drive and once I was even asked if I could cry out of the blind eye. Um...yes I can. My answer....I don't know any difference. This is me...the way I was born.

2.) I once accused a teacher of sexual harrasment as an April Fool's prank. (yeah, I know...so unlike me, but I was in theater and felt like being dramatic.) Turns out the year after I graduated he was fired for having a student in his room during a four day retreat...go figure.

3.) I love Hugh Grant movies!! They make me happy!

4.) I can NOT wear underwear to bed, unless of course Aunt Flo has come to visit. As I once told a friend...sometimes you need to air that sucker out! It also goes to say that at night I have to sleep with my feet outside of the blankets. I feel like they suffocate if I don't have them out.

5.) When I was a little girl I was running around our backyard like I was on fire. My Dad had said, "You got ants in your pants?" I stopped dead in my tracks, dropped my pants and undies looked down and said no!

6.) My best friend taught me how to speak double talk. It's a great way to say a lot of things you don't want people to hear....yitiho knitigo whitagut itigi mitigean?!

And now I shall pass on the torch of randomness to those who wish to participate....

My Weight Loss Journey: Discovering the real me

Mom and More

Art For Everyone

Kat Fitzgerald

For Your Eyes Only

The Bunny Years

I CAN DO

2009-01-06T10:43:00.001-06:00

Let me seek solace in winter’s blanket
I will say farewell and part to the days of hibernation
Where I can rest this washed out head
Cluttered as all my thoughts collapse
Escaping through these crystal tears
Somehow I am no longer thirsty
Dressed up for the occasion that has never arrived

This rickety house has brushed away the happy days
I sit in the middle of the hardwood floor
The living room reel of slipped memories
The coldness underneathPenetrates lonely days I wish to rid of
There will be no more, you hear?
In my black sparkly party dress
The straps too loose upon my shoulders
I sigh, shiver in the briskness
Inhale the dreariness as if I needed to be reminded
Of how sadness can catch on so easily
I do not need to be reminded
This abandoned room needs some color
A kiss of red
An Ocean blue
With a sunlight yellow
Maybe I could jazz it up with my touch
I have so much to give

The wind pierces through the shattered windows
Pieces of glass scattered around creating a mirror ball in my mind
I shall stand up and dance
Summon the music from behind my lips
Sing as if there is no tomorrow
Laugh out loud
And dismiss the loneliness lurking around
I will follow my instincts
Because they are my best judgment
That I can make a difference in anyone’s eyes
If they’d just take a mere second and look my way
If let go of the fear
I can be rest assured
That I, yes I….can do anything

PHOTOS FROM NEW YEAR'S EVE

2009-01-04T20:09:00.006-06:00

A New Year's Eve tradition from the last three years. Spent at Gunther's in Plainfield with Finneus! Great music and Great friends. I couldn't ask for more!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

2009-01-04T19:55:00.007-06:00

Well, here we are 2009! My Mom once told me that as soon as I turned 21 the years would begin to fly by. She wasn't kidding!! I am now 34 and I find myself pondering about life all the time. I have a good feeling about this year. As very well I should. I've definitely been on the roller coaster of life for a long time now. I want to start rising to the top and make things happen this year! I want to try and brush away as much as the negative that I can. We all have our New Year's resolutions. Do we actually stick with them? I'm sure half of us don't. I want to try and stick to my resolution. I've been so uncomfortable in my skin the last few years and I don't want to be that woman anymore. I want to eat better, exercise, follow my dreams. Do things that I've always wanted to do.

I can't wait for my poetry book to be released! There's still much work to be done, but I am so excited to be doing something for myself! I get so much slack for self publishing my book, but at this point I just want to put it out there to see what kind of response I get. I want to say that I did that.

I got an acoustic guitar as a gift from Phil Angotti. A thank you for all the photos I've done for him throughout the years. I want to learn how to play. I want to take voice lessons because I've always loved to sing. I want to travel and see the world! I want the person I love to love me back. I just want to be happy.

I am thankful for the things I have. For my independence and creativity. For my good friends who have loved and supported me. I want to love life and live it the best that I can.

NEED ME

2008-12-24T19:44:00.001-06:00

Feels much later than it really is

The shortness of your words

Gently puts your point across

Something about the way you avoid

Your plan of not hurting me

I think you better start looking for a new plan

Why put off the inevitable

Let’s rip it out

When you appear

My heart beats right out of my chest

I lazily waste time in my thoughts

You still consume them

Not when I least expect

But every time I expect

You can now crown me the fool

Gallons of water will never quench this thirst

That has suddenly cursed me

My dry coated throat longs for refreshment

It is never coming

So now what?

We have rules

So you say

I break them

For they are no longer shatter proof

Not in this game

I steal what I can hold in my hands

I must admit it isn’t much

Yet I will always long to seek some kind of comfort

Dig for some kind of approval

That somewhere in the middle of all of this

You need me

More than I need you

SHIA LABEOUF

2008-12-24T18:49:00.006-06:00

Ok, seriously? When did Disney's channel....little Even Stevens get this freakin hot?! Whew! Come on now!! Shia has come a long way. He is a wonderful up and coming actor. His movies already give him a lot to show for! He's one to be watched for years to come!! I can not wait to see "Eagle Eye," I believe it is being released next week!!

JAMES MCAVOY

2008-12-24T18:41:00.003-06:00

So I have this MAJOR thing for James McAvoy!!! He is an incredibly talented brilliant actor!! I am a huge fan of his! He shows much passion in the characters he portrays. I admire him dearly. If you don't know what I'm talking about then check out his movies..."The Last King of Scotland," "Atonement," "Becoming Jane," "Starter For Ten," and "Penelope." He's sexy and he's from Scotland! Meow! He can talk to me all day long!! I won't say that I'm obsessed, but I am definitely on a McAvoy kick right about now! I can't get enough!!!!

SOME RECENT PHOTOGRAPHS

2008-12-24T17:47:00.003-06:00

FITZGERALD'S

2008-12-24T17:41:00.003-06:00

ROOT CAUSE

2008-12-24T17:27:00.004-06:00

Thanks to Brian Mickey, drummer of Finneus, I had the chance to photograph another band he is in called Root Cause. I wasn't sure what to expect when asked to photograph them, but once I saw their live show I was hooked! I am thrilled to be working on photographing them next year for their upcoming CD. I am also thrilled to be working with another band fronted by Maximus Riske called Khaos Theory. He has asked me to photograph their upcoming CD as well. Next year is going to be a great year! I can feel it in my bones! I am ecstatic! I have to admit, for a while I was slipping away on photographing bands and let me tell you...it feels SO GOOD to be back in the swing of things!!

SELF PORTRAIT

2008-12-24T17:26:00.002-06:00

NIGHT FORGOTTON COME MORNING

2008-12-24T17:24:00.000-06:00

Will you remember me?
After the night you say goodbye
A glass of wine
I will pour my sorrows in
The scar across my back shoulder
Is nothing compared to the scar deep inside

I sometimes forget
How could I forget?
When it all suddenly falls apart
A lapse in memory
Your reach
Gravel roads away
This sadness leaks in streams
Like leaves crunched underneath our feet
Surround sound blaring
The silence overwhelming

The heat close to melting
The truth of mixed up lies
I lied
Yes I confess
Told you I didn't love you
When I did
Gave my best shot
A dismissal for all the wrong reasons
A string of symptoms
I let get the best of me
The ink smears
The words are blurred
The night is gone
Come morning…
You have already forgotten
And I have disappeared

© Dina Darling

THE WEBSTIRS

2008-12-24T17:17:00.005-06:00

The Webstirs another MUST see local Chicago band. Full of energy and charismatic stage energy!

SOLID SINCERITY

2008-12-24T17:14:00.002-06:00

Quiet times reflect off the absurdity of my mind
Paint fumes kicking in
Suddenly I can't breathe
I'm dizzy
Ready to faint
Won't somebody catch me?
Terrified of being alone
Can't stand sleeping in the cold

Scars are permanent I know
We don't ever really heal
And I'm okay with that
An every day reminder of what I've been going through
I learned how to love
All by myself
Aren't you proud of me?
The sacrifices I have stolen
And made them all my own

I'll keep kicking and screaming
I never back down from a fight
Even if it's against myself
I'll duke it out in the ring
Till either I win or get knocked out
I can't take anymore of this doubt
Creeping up my back
Biting me
I wish I were a magician
To make all the struggling
I'm battling with
Slowly disappear

Let me be a dream machine
Myth and truth stuck between
The opposite of the definite meaning
I can't quite say for sure
What it is I need
A change in atmosphere
A brighter sun to reckon with
A ghostly fog haunting me
A deck of cards not fit for a queen

Leave me be
You don't want to get too close
It might be contagious
And devour you
Kick around the consequences
Of past behaviors
I never looked the other way
And I should have stared dead on
Soaking in the realization
Of a good day and a bad day
And the strength to tell the difference
When in the long run…
I need something solid to believe
In all honor and sincerity

WITH YOU TONIGHT

2008-12-24T17:13:00.002-06:00

I'm running late
Yet my own clock tells me I'm on time
Searching over and under
This need stays close to my heal
Always on my trail
Come closer
Whisper all you've been longing to say

The one thing I can't have
It will be the end of me
It's the only thing I want
How can I get it?
Give me an accusation
While my heart waits on the line
The one thing I can't have
You won't let me get my way

God I am so stubborn
You can't compete with me
I'm so good in my own right
But how will he discover me
Put down the pages
These words are suddenly a blur
If you can't hear the passion in my voice
Then I don't know what you're doing hear in the first place

I want you
It's out in the open
I'm calling for you
I want you
The tingling sensation between my legs desires your taste
Let me have my way with you
I will do you no wrong tonight
I won't let you down
Not when you're wrapped up in my sheets
Stop toying with my affection
Let me have the right
To get it on with you tonight

ERIC HOWELL CD RELEASE PARTY

2008-12-24T17:08:00.003-06:00

Wow, talk about a night of amazing music! The long anticipated wait for Eric Howell's CD "Greatest Hitch, Vol 1" was over!! Well worth the wait that's for sure!! An incredible show that will be remembered for years to come!The night was filled with amazing talent! Eric was joined all throughout the night by the following musicians:Jim Barclay, Lonni Lane, Mike Zelenko, John Riley, Leroy, Mike Waggoner, Randy Antlept, Casey McDonough, Phil Angotti, Tony Kidonakis, Jamie Motz, Ryan Nelson and Mike Sharp.

**More photos can be found on my facebook and myspace pages!

HOLIDAY LIGHTS AT LINCOLN PARK ZOO

2008-12-24T16:55:00.010-06:00

As promised, here are a few more shots from Lincoln Park Zoo. To see more check out my photography fan page on facebook or my myspace page. Just do a search for Dina Darling on Facebook.

A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS

2008-12-24T11:27:00.003-06:00

Christmas Eve here already. Wow! Christmas just isn't the same to me now that Grandma and Grandpa are both gone. This was the first year that I went all out in decorating the house in five years! I made our house look like the North Pole for the fact that my brother and sister came into town the day after Thanksgiving! They were in awe when they walked in the door. Their reaction was priceless and the reason I did it all in the first place. We had such a great time while they were here. I have lots of catching up to do once again on this blog. I also have lots of photos to add. We went to see the Holiday lights at Lincoln Park Zoo. Got some great shots from there. I will get to posting more soon!

In the meantime...I wish everyone a safe and Merry Christmas!!

To get into the Christmas Spirit I will share some of my fave Christmas things...

Fave Christmas song: "Carol Of The Bells."

Fave Christmas movie: "The Santa Clause," though I can't forget those beautiful romantic Christmas comedies such as "Love Actually," and "Serendipity."

Fave Christmas memory: Receiving my Grandmother's mother's wedding ring from my cousin Angie. A very long story that I will not share here but let's just say three days before my Grandma passed she told she wanted me to have it. The will said otherwise. Once my cousin's and I reconciled after four years, mostly much anger on my end...Angie gave me the ring. I am forever grateful to her kindness! I am happy we are all a family once again.

Fave Christmas tradition: Every year my Mom goes all out and makes an incredible breakfast for all us. We eat and then open gifts.

Fave Christmas activity: This year was one of the best since I'm back in the spirit. We saw the holiday lights, baked cookies and made stockings.

Fave Christmas story: Of course that would be "Twas the Night Before Christmas."

I know there is much more I can list, but I will stop for now. Enjoy your Holiday!

PLAYING CATCH UP

2008-10-31T13:36:00.004-05:00

First off, HAPPY HALLOWEEN to everyone!! Halloween has always been one of my favorite times of the year. October my fave month! So whatever everyone is doing, I hope you have fun and most importantly stay safe.

Now...where do I even begin? There has been so much happening and I've been slacking on my writing. My focus has been elsewhere. Most currently I have been HIGHLY involved with a community known as "Webook." I actually discovered the website through an advertisement on facebook. I thought I would check it out. There have been speculations as to if this website is a "farse," but I have to say just getting the feedback I've been getting from fellow writers has made all the difference. Webook is considered the American Idol of writing. You submit your poetry, short stories...etc, whatever it is you write. Members of the community vote and give feedback to your work. I have created a project of my own, as well as submitting several pieces of poetry to other projects. It has been a joy to be a part of. If any of you decide to check it out you can find me in one of two ways. My project titled. "The Safety Of Madness," or my member name. "Dina2674." I'm actually mad about the member name. When I first joined it mentioned creating numbers within your name and turns out, it didn't have to be that way. I would prefer not to be known as "Dina2674." Oh well, what can you do. Unfortunately this can not be changed.

After months of submitting my work I started to get tons of feedback. I have to say with the exception of maybe one or two negative comments the feedback has been positive. I feel at home here. It's amazing the take others see in your writing. You get this amazing sense of accomplishment. There are thousands and thousands of writers from all over the world! Everyone has such immense talent and it's wonderful to be able to share that with so many people who share your interest. There are six pages of top writers. It changes every day depending on the votes you get. I was honored just to be within the those top six pages and now as I have been reviewing and submitting more, I am proud to share that I am number eight within the whole community!!! A big deal I must say. It could change on a daily basis and I may have to fight for my rank at times, but I just love being so involved in this. It truly makes me the happiest girl in the world.

Leading to my next big thing....I have FINALLY decided to self publish a poetry book. For years, people have been telling me to get my work out there. I have had such encouragement from friends of mine that I am finally going to take the plunge. I am so excited to get started on this. I liked the idea of my project so much that I have decided I am going to stick with that and have my book titled "The Safety of Madness." I am even more excited that one of my closest friends David Kav is going to write the forward for me. He is one of the main people who lit the fire under my bum so David, a big thank you!! I am hoping that the book will be complete and ready for purchase early next year. I am thrilled to also be working with the ever talented Erica Ard on helping me literally put the whole thing together. I could not do this on my own so I am thankful to everyone who is contributing.

On the music front, I have an upcoming photo shoot with the one and only Phil Angotti. His newest CD should be released early next year as well. My winter project, thanks to Phil will be learning guitar. My belated birthday present and gift for years of photos is the guitar. I am so excited. I can't wait to get my hands on it.

Also coming out is the long awaited anticipation of Eric Howell's CD "Greatest Hitch!" CD release party December 20th at the Viaduct Theatre. Well worth the 13 years of hard work he has been putting into this!

Also if you have not purchased David Kav's new CD "Better You Here Than Alone," then you are missing out completely!!

That's all for now. I'll be back! I promise I won't be gone for as long as I have been!!

DAVID KAV WITH FINNEUS

2008-09-15T14:18:00.009-05:00

As luck would have it...Finneus happened to have a gig the weekend we were in Michigan. Dave of Finneus asked if I knew anyone who could take the opening slot for their show. My first response of course was David Kav. I knew David had a show previously booked, but turns out it was cancelled so he was in. I was more than excited to bring this set of musicians together for the first time ever! Of course the show was rockin!!! I love being involved in the whole music scene from singing, photography, manager for a day, getting the chance to be in the studio and even getting to do the song list for a show. Being surrounded by music makes me the happiest girl in the world!!! Here's a couple shots from that night!

NEW BUFFALO MICHIGAN

2008-09-15T14:11:00.006-05:00

I've been slacking on my posts lately. The first weekend in September, me and three of my friends decided we need a mini get away! We headed for New Buffalo Michigan. Our suite was off the Marina, near the beach. We decided we definitely need to do this more often!

CD IS FINISHED

2008-09-14T19:30:00.003-05:00

Woo hoo! David Kav's CD "Better You Here Than Alone," has arrived!! After all our hard work, we are both very happy with the end results. Last night was the CD release party and it was a huge success!! I highly recommend checking out his music! www.myspace.com/davidkav

WORLD SHOULD SEE

2008-09-12T10:25:00.001-05:00

You make me break my concentration
Every single time
Losing all the letters as each word breaks off at the tip
What was that you said?
I was too busy mesmerizing your angelic face
You have to believe you can never turn back to the past
The harm was left behind
That was the very reasoning
Yet all these years later
I find myself kissing you again
I become lost for hours upon hours
By the taste of your sweet satisfying lips

You found me
Time may have lapsed…Ah but it never forgets
Why?
Are you going to break my heart again?
I’ll let you break it into a million pieces
As long as I’m putting in my time
I’m terrified of being left behind
You’ve changed
You’re not the man I knew
However, my yearning for you
Never did come unglued
Even with all your faults
I still want to be a piece of your something
I’d let you be my everything
But we both know we may never be

We share in these intimate moments on lonely nights
When we need the sense of the familiar
This my friend, is all too real
You lay next to me
The rhythm tic of the song in your heart beat
I sing along perfectly on key
This was meant to be
Yet you tell me to hold up for a minute
You want to share the comfort of my bed
But we can never be?
I question the truth to our possibilities
You have had me
Well what about needing me?
We have been in unison from day one
Why are you refusing to let this rise to the surface?
The greatest love?
Maybe, maybe not, but why fight the shot
This is life
Why turn it away?
The way we are
The energy between the two of us…
Now that’s something the world should see

IN THE LOVE

2008-09-12T10:24:00.003-05:00

All I have to do today
Is take that deep breath
Five minutes before I see you
Shaky on the inside
I count down
One, two, here I go
Falling into you

A noisy crowded room
You still mange to find me
Our eyes connect and lock
No one else exists
Between the heat, the music, my martini sip
I’m drunk or am I high
Dreaming with you

As each day passes I find the courage
To let my love grow even more
A rose that shines from the inside out
These lips can never lie
I can promise to justify
The feeling is mutual
Wanting all of you

Someone stop me before I cross the line
I have never fallen so far
Sometimes I think I need to step backwards
Just to replay the scene I created
Was that the right move?
Was it the best way to get close to you?
Oh no I just admitted it
I’m in love with you

AN ACQUIRED NEED

2008-09-12T10:24:00.002-05:00

Peace of mind sailed out the window
With your cool breeze I was stranded
Searching for the lost beauty that once filled my eyes
Now as the days pass
The hours dragged into the mud
I still have the strength to smile
Your love was just resting on my shoulder
A silhouette to where I’ve come from

Don’t leave me hanging on like this
I sketched your face inside every corner of my mind
It makes an appearance just when I’m missing you enough
I lean up against the wall
Then I walk outside to catch the summer sun
All I ever wanted was for you to return the feelings
I left waiting for you
Knocking on the door of my heart
I will always answer
I will always be home
There’s no one else I want to open myself to

Something about you baby
Something about you that drives me wild
Our paths are crooked I realize
We’re a bit off beat from time to time
That never stops me from wanting to run to your arms
They know precisely how to hold me
I feel so safe
Nothing bad could ever get in
That’s why I need you
Somewhere along the way
I hate it when you slip away
Keep me calm in this feisty wave
So I don’t lose my balance
So I don’t feel myself suffocating
Or drowning in the rain…

MY DEFENSE

2008-08-29T09:28:00.001-05:00

Having a rough time with this all
Spreading the word
Color coating my world
Putting myself out there
On my knees ready to crawl

Speak of the truth and I will be kind
The love I possess
The type you’d kill to find
Why turn towards the rainy direction
When the sun is tapping on your back
Toying with the pauses of your affection
You must stop to think every once in a while
Why do I pause?
Maybe it’s hard to admit
You do need my affection

Test after test
Doubt after doubt
The lies come dry
And you’re not even sure if they are really lies
Fear handcuffed you to the chair
Just like I’m going to have my way with you
Seduction my only air
I told you once
I’ll keep telling you until you give in
Yes, now!

We see eye to eye
Always have
We dream side by side
Always will
We feel the touch of loneliness
Every now and again
We get by
On the words we need to say
They are our only weapon
And our only defense

SAFETY OF MADNESS

2008-08-29T09:02:00.002-05:00

The obsession of it all is complete madness
Indeed it is
The weight of the mind so heavy on the entire body
I can not move
Paralyzed by the fear of watching you drift away
I try to say this need is unhealthy
But it is as normal as a compliment perception
A suggestion of piecing together the time we had lost

Let me close my eyes
For only a few moments
I must relish in this scenery
My private sanctuary
Too good to be true
I’m afraid if I move the slightest
Ever so delicately
I will have missed out on all that could come to me
Please, I pray, that mustn’t happen

I let trail behind me the green eyed monster
On my heal
At my beck and call
Not now I whisper
This isn’t a good time for you to follow me
Why are you bickering with me?
I do not wish to fight today

My collection keeps growing
And he is every reason I write
I wish I understood it
Wish I knew why my passion
Will not release its grip on me
Terrified of this bottled up emotion
Overloaded and seconds closer to explosion
What will happen to me when it has officially set off?

I’m out of my head these days
Racking up the reasons
Then washing them down the drain
Dizzy and out of sorts
I stumble
Looking to go nowhere else
Than the safety of your eyes
They always find a way to rescue me