SWALLOW SURVIVE

I’m sinking in a bad place right now
In the zone
Leave me alone
I can’t get out of this darkness
This darkness that surrounds my fragile thoughts
Climbing over the walls with aggravation
Ripping into my pores
This isn’t the way I like to portray who I am
I’m almost ashamed of myself
Though why should I be?
The glitter in the air is now dust
Pushing my way through all the pain you laid

I’m exhausted
Broken in two
The dim light disappearing into the blue
Drowning faster in your ocean
You consume the depths of my mind
Like a waterfall
I need to release this rushing sensation
I’m numb
The feeling is gone
Choking on my tears
How do you really learn to say goodbye
When it crosses your lips and you swallow it back down

You push me around
Whether it’s subconsciously
Or for your own personal amusement
Then you walk away and I’m left punching holes in my shadow
A toy in your game
Beating me to the floor
I said leave me alone
Keep walking across
The stains permanently engravedWatch them bleed
Every time you think it might be good to speak my name

In the zone
Bounded by this invisible box
I can’t go up
I always face down
Circle round and round
Choking on my tears
How do you really learn to say goodbye
When it crosses your lips and you swallow it back down
You learn how…
You learn how to survive

© Dina Darling